More Top Picks Best Fire Blankets
player ready...Baby, it’s cold outside. But hopefully it’s warm in your pants. Or it will be once you read this edition of quick and dirty advice. Jonesin’ for fall? Check out last season’s conundrums here. Otherwise, button up, buttercups! And get ready to warm your chestnuts on my fire. That came out wrong.
Dear Anna: How soon is too soon to dump a guy I don’t feel crazy about? It’s been about a month and a half and not even an inkling of butterflies. Do I need a better reason to end it?
Nope. If you’re not feelin’ it, then you’re not feelin’ it. That’s reason enough. Plus, ’tis the season for breakups. Really. Post-Christmas but before Valentine’s Day is a common time span for ending lackluster relationships. Out with the old, in with the new boo, as it were.
Dear Anna: It’s been three months. He wants to keep it “casual.” I’m looking to take things further. Do I go along with the way things are or say something?
By all means, say something. But if he says he wants to keep it casual and you’re not happy with that, then be prepared to move on.
Dear Anna: My roommate complained that I am “too loud” during sex. She wants me to “keep it down,” but I feel like it would dampen my experience, and also that this is one of the prices we pay for communal living! Am I being insensitive?
A little, yes. We owe our roommates SOME consideration, if for nothing else than to keep the peace, but I have no idea if you’re actually “too loud” because I’m not standing outside your door because, rudely enough, I wasn’t invited. Make a little effort to try to muffle your muff time—you don’t have to be all Charlie Chaplin about it, just don’t go full operatic if you can help it. Remember too that being restrained and secretive in bed can be pretty hot.
Dear Anna: When will this crushing heartache unleash me from its jaws?
If I had to guess, I’d say April 19, 2016. (Yeah, that’s a shameless plug for my book.) Spring is a helluva drug, and so is time. Hang in there. You’ll make it—gloriously spectacularly—to the other side.
Dear Anna: My ex (of five years) is starting to date. Why am I so upset by this when I’m the one who ended it?
Because our love for people doesn’t disappear even though the relationship may be over. Allow yourself to be upset for a little while and then move the fuck on. He is. You should too. Remember the reasons why you broke up with him and don’t over-think things too much. Life always goes on, whether we want it to or not, whether we’re ready for it or not. You can’t fight it, and you can’t stop it. All you can do is bear it and keep moving.
Anna Pulley is a Redeye contributor. Got a question of your own? Email [email protected]. Or let her send you overly personal emails here.