Most of us have a problem with people whose success depends on others’ failures. Repo men, drug dealers and parking-meter readers are despised in our culture because they cash in when we screw up. They’re misery merchants.
But David Bradley is an exception. You may have never heard of David Bradley, but you’ve probably used his invention. His success depends on computer failure. As the programmer/inventor of CtrlAltDelete, he has offered millions of computer users solace in times of technological terror.
“It’s a clever little thing that has had a huge impact,” said Professor Pete Nelson, head of the University of Illinois-Chicago’s Department of Computer Science. “If Bradley had a penny for every time CtrlAltDelete was used, he’d be the richest man in the world.”
For those who aren’t computer users and have stumbled upon this newspaper in a quest for fire, CtrlAltDelete is the key combination that reboots computers when they freeze, crash, jam, etc. Technological masterpieces, computers crash at an upsetting rate.
“I may have invented [CtrlAltDelete], but Bill [Gates] made it famous,” said Bradley in a great dig at the creator of crash-prone Windows. “I refer to CtrlAltDelete as the three-finger salute to Bill Gates,” added Nelson.
Before CtrlAltDelete, the procedure to fix a frozen computer was much more complicated. First, users would mutter “No… NO… NOOOO!” Step Two involved screaming obscenities at the unblinking computer screen. Step Three entailed slamming the side of the monitor with one’s fist.
With his invention, Bradley offered us a civilized, less-Fonzied way to bring machines back to life. By pressing CtrlAltDelete, we can pull that term paper, spread sheet or ransom note from the wreckage of a computer crash.
Initially created for PCs, a Macintosh version of Bradley’s key combination was soon developed. The iMac on which I’m working, for example, freezes so often I’d like to take a Louisville Slugger to the mother … OptionAppleEsc … Sorry. My computer crashed.
The combination works so well with computers it’s a shame it doesn’t work in other areas of life. Want to remedy a spiraling romance? CtrlAltDelete and return to the honeymoon stage. Want the cops off your tail? CtrlAltDelete and you’re a prized citizen. Want a supermodel from the ’80s? CarolAltDelete.
“I didn’t know it was going to be a cultural icon,” Bradley was quoted on CNN.com as saying. “I did a lot of other things than Ctrl-AltDelete, but I’m famous for that one.”
It’s disheartening when true geniuses are remembered for only one accomplishment. Einstein was much more than just E=MC2. Hulk Hogan was so much more than just a wrestler.
But it’s tough to shake a label, especially one as catchy as “CtrlAltDelete guy,” as Bradley will forever be known (or, more appropriately, forever won’t be known).
Since the birth of personal computing in the mid ’70s, technology has advanced beyond our wildest dreams. Even Bradley couldn’t have imagined the weird and wondrous places computers are now malfunctioning. Processors are crashing in robotic rovers on the dusty surface of Mars. Mainframes are crashing on fiber-optic systems miles below the ocean. Tiny, publicity-generating transmitters are crashing atop Janet Jackson’s nipples. It’s a brave new world of computer malfunction, but Bradley is no longer around to guide us out of trouble.
He’s hanging up his pocket protector and relinquishing his nerd badge after 28 years of computer programming at IBM. But he’s only 55 years old–far too young to hit CtrlAltDelete on his professional life. So he plans on teaching at North Carolina State University, where he will uncharacteristically have to deliver failures to malfunctioning students.
I picture some bleary-eyed computer science pupil trying to pull a fast one. “Um, Professor Bradley? Uh, like, I worked on the assignment all night but, like, my computer crashed, and I lost it.”
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