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Men don’t know how to dress themselves. Or eat dinner out. Or select a wine. That’s the premise of a new marketing campaign for Slates, Levi Strauss & Co.’s hot-selling line of dress pants.

Shoppers who try on a pair of Slates between June 10 and 21 at Lord & Taylor or Carson, Pirie Scott & Co. will receive a 56-page dining and style guide called “First Course.” The booklet offers men helpful advice such as “Throw your razor blades out twice as often as you usually do. They’re called disposable for a reason.”

In the dressing, area, men are advised to “Always wear socks. Match belt and shoes. Use common sense and keep it simple.” No-no’s include mixing patterns, buttoning the last vest button and getting wild with ties.

Shoppers who actually buy a pair of Slates during the promotion will receive a $25 certificate good at Chicago restaurants including Le Colonial, Topo Gigio, Tuscany and Mango.

All the advice sounds good. But reminding men about their stereotyped shortcomings may not be the smartest way to sell a $75 pair of pants.

Tiny empire: Sears, Roebuck and Co. obviously likes what it sees at The Great Indoors, a new home remodeling and decorating store it has created and built outside Denver.

The single-store operation now has its own president: Robert R. Rodgers, a 28-year Sears veteran who has spent the last year commuting to Denver from Chicago’s western suburbs. Previously, Rodgers reported to Jerry Post, who also heads Sears’ fast-growing hardware store division.

Soon, Rodgers will be in charge of two stores. Sears has selected a site in suburban Detroit for its next Great Indoors debut.

Sounds like a lot more are on the way.

Teen trap: Understanding the teenage market is one of the most difficult and lucrative challenges facing retailers. Teenagers–11 million of whom hold jobs–control an estimated $80 billion a year in discretionary spending.

And the teen population, now around 26 million, is expected to increase through the year 2010, when 30 million teens will be trying the patience of their parental units.

One thing’s for sure: Their tastes will change quickly. Teenagers ran through retro 1950s, ’60s, ’70s and ’80s fashion in just eight seasons, said James Palczynski, a retail analyst with Ladenburg Thalmann, a New York-based investment bank, who specializes in the teen market.

The latest hot theme among teens is California fashion. And companies such as Quiksilver Inc., which has been making surf-related apparel for 30 years, are going gangbusters now that their alternative fashion has earned broad teen appeal.

Yet investors generally have shied away from such publicly held companies, fetaring they have short life spans and a lot of risk. But they also carry a big payoff. Palczynzski’s “YouthQuake Index” of 19 companies serving the teen apparel and footwear market has risen 105 percent since the beginning of 1996, compared with 37 percent for the Russell 2000 index of small stocks.

Among the companies he likes are Pacific Sunwear, another California surf-apparel maker; Candies Inc., the shoe maker targeting female teens; and Hot Topic Inc., a chain of 120 stores featuring music-related apparel, gift items and body jewelry. Remember Spencer Gifts, the teen mall store of the 1970s, with its black-light posters, loud music and incense? You’ve got the general idea, Palczynski said.

Not all retailers will be able to capitalize on the teen trend because one of the things these marketing-savvy young people look for is authenticity, he warns.

Other marketing tips for teen retailers, courtesy of Palczynski: Use music as a marketing tool; be irreverent; and stay away from sexism and racism. “They are the fastest ways to kill yourself,” he said.