Advisory to the Mail Room: No future correspondence will be accepted by this office unless it uses, please, the Marilyn Monroe stamp.
Sir:
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It is a sign of the times when a little Notre Dame pipsqueak such as you earns a living calling some athletes, and others, insulting names. Who do you think you are? Yes, I was born in Indiana and mighty proud of it (except for your alma mater, which also stinks). Do you think Chicago, New York and Los Angeles are the only teams that have the right to play in tournaments? Just what is your problem?–Jean Fox, Carol Stream.
Madam,
Jock itch.
Dear Mr. B. Lincicome,
You said the Orlando team was young enough to have a curfew. Last time I checked, after the age of 18 a curfew is no longer in effect. Was that statement supposed to be funny?–Chandra Howard, age 15, Chicago.
Dear Miss C. Howard,
I sigh for tomorrow’s sense of humor.
Dear Bernie,
You miss the point entirely about baseball needing shorter games. Once upon a time the most popular entertainment was watching stereopticon slides. Today a movie has to have the latest special effects or it is in danger of becoming “The Bridges of Madison County.” As the penny arcade gave way to the high-tech video center, so does baseball have to give way to SAS (Short Attention Span) sports. Do we really want to go back to those awful days before the TV remote? What you mistake for frivolous panic is, my good man, good old-fashioned American progress.–Ralph Barringer, Indianapolis.
Dear Ralph,
How could I have been so dumb?
Dear Mr. Lincicome,
Having worked in athletics, I have grown increasingly weary of the onslaught of private information shared by and about prominent athletes. The sharing of inappropriate or unnecessary details provides poor standards for impressionable children and teenagers who view athletes as their role models. What happened to integrity and privacy?–Janet Fenn, Gainesville, Fla.
Dear Ms. Fenn,
Tonya Harding.
Dear Mr. Lincicome,
Life is a story of one rising to his or her prime, getting a peek at what it feels like to be at the top, and slowly but surely declining to failure. This has been made manifest through empires, species and Michael Jordan’s performance this year. Mr. Jordan has already proved what he has to prove. He is getting older (believe it or not) and surely does not want to end his career the way Babe Ruth did, bitterly. Time moves on and so do legacies.–Martin Floreani, Park Ridge.
Dear Mr. Floreani,
Jordan ended his first career bitterly. Failure may help him to go out smiling this time.
Dear Mr. Lincicome,
What do you find so bad about hockey that you have to degrade it by calling it the sport of last resort? It isn’t last resort for me and many others. Hockey is the fastest, hardest hitting sport that I find enjoyable. Why do you have such a dislike for the game?–Darren Rosenberg, Palatine.
Dear Mr. Rosenberg,
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Ice hockey, air hockey, roller hockey? Please be sport specific.
Mr. Lincicome,
Having an optimistic outlook and encouragement would be much better than the flavor of pessimism in your articles.–Nancy Gibson, Harrah, Okla.
Ms. Gibson,
Didn’t help Gene Lamont.