In the nearly 20 years since I’ve had kids in school, a whole lot has changed, and truth is, I thought I was doing a decent job keeping up to date.
That is, until I walked into a gymnasium last weekend at Naperville Central High School.
I was there to watch my grandkid’s first tournament under the Illinois Kids Wrestling Federation.
A second-grader, her name is Gracie. And I figured this event would include mostly young males because, well, I also assumed there aren’t enough girls in this sport to have a tournament of their own.
Boy, was I wrong.
To show just how far out of it I was, I walked the entire length of the packed gymnasium, climbed to the top of the far right bleacher, situating myself in a crowded corner before finally taking a good look around.
Every athlete in the packed house was indeed female.
Some were little more than tots – 4-, 5- and 6-year-olds — walking around in tiny singlets and headgear covering their delicate French braids or ponytails. Most of the participants were upper elementary and middle school age, as I quickly found out this West Suburban Girls Wrestling club tournament was titled “Girls Rule Rumble.”
My surprise stems from thousands of personal hours logged in gyms all over the Chicago area and beyond, as my sons took part in this sport through 2005. One of my most vivid memories was watching as the lone girl on one of their junior high teams was given the choice of cutting her long hair that kept coming out of a skullcap under her headgear or forfeiting the match to her male opponent.
She chose to keep wrestling. And I watched in shock – anger, too – as her coach brandished a pair of scissors and, in front of the entire crowd, lopped off that thick braid.
She lost the match. And I always felt that females everywhere lost hard-fought points that day.
Fortunately, girls have come a long way on playing fields, and gym mats, with women’s wrestling becoming part of the Olympics in 2004. And it’s grown in popularity.
But it’s only been recently that female wrestling has really caught fire in our area, in part because 2021 – which was the 50th anniversary of the passage of Title IX – was the first year for a girls wrestling division sanctioned by the Illinois High School Association, making it the 28th state to do so.
As it turned out, at this Naperville Central tournament, I was sitting next to the girls wrestling coach at Niles West High School, who was there to cheer on her good friend’s daughter. And Caitlin Casey happily filled me in on just how popular the sport has become, noting that in the last few years, the number of high school participants jumped from around 600 to over 1,600.
What makes this growth even better, she told me, is how the male wrestlers, rather than grouse about girls in their rough and tumble arena, are now welcoming them on the mat, with some boys even wearing T-shirts that proclaim “Girls Can Wrestle Too.”
Taylin Long told me she’s got a guy friend whose T-shirt reads “Wrestle like a girl.”
Long is a 19-year-old grappler for Aurora University’s female program, who also coaches K-8 girls with the Illinois Kids Wrestling Federation feeder programs for Batavia and St. Charles East high schools.
The Batavia grad has been a fan of this sport since fifth grade when she competed in her first match – against a boy, of course. Wrestling guys was pretty much the way she had to roll all the way through her senior year at Batavia, Long recalled, adding that finding female opponents meant traveling further or competing in smaller brackets.
These days tell a different story. North Central College, now considered one of the top women’s wrestling programs in the nation, introduced its first team in in 2019. And there are over 30 collegiate programs across the country, including Aurora University, which is in its second year.
“Exponentially,” is how this increase is described by Coach Charles Graves, who leads the girls team at West Aurora High School, now in its first official year. “What we are seeing is amazing.”
There are about 20 girls out for the team this season, he added, including two who are state qualifiers from last year. And Graves expects those numbers to go up in high schools everywhere, thanks in large part to successful local feeder programs.
In the four hours I sat on that top far right bleacher I watched with equal pride and amazement as these young girls went out on those mats, shook hands – some like Gracie with freshly painted nails – and then proceeded to kick butt in moves that, not so long ago, were described as “unlady-like.”
One thing I came to appreciate in my many years watching wrestling is the dedication and work that goes into this sport. But there is also a big payoff, in confidence, self-reliance and self-discipline, all of which play into a healthy mindset as well as strong body.
Long was quick to mention the “life lessons” she’s learned from the sport, which include the ability to “push through moments of weakness” whether on the mat or with everyday problems that come our way.
Wrestling is tough, no doubt about it.
And it produces plenty of tears.
After my granddaughter won her first match – 6-5, it was a nail-biter for those of us who are her biggest fans – her dad freely admitted he cried.
Gracie did too, in his arms after getting pinned in her second match.
“Girls are a little more emotional; you will see more tears, but that’s OK,” admitted Casey, who is coaching six wrestlers this year, all of whom she considers “amazing young women” as well as “trailblazers.”
It takes a lot to step out there on the mat, all three coaches insisted, which is why wrestling tends to draw independent, strong-minded kids who want to win but aren’t afraid to fail.
“Our girls,” noted West Aurora Coach Charles Graves, “walk with a lot of confidence.”