ARRGHH! DISNEY WALKS THE PLANK FOR POLITICALLY CORRECT
A heated debate has taken place in Southern California over whether political correctness has stuck its pointy nose into one of the oldest and most popular features of Disneyland. It...
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MONEY TALKS, AND SOME ARE TRYING TO TRANSLATE IT
Suddenly, the Great Onics Race is on as various groups and individuals rush to have their own whatsis-American language officially recognized with federal funds. A former colleague at the Chicago...
WHEN YOU TALK IN EBONICS, WORDS JUST GET IN THE WAY
I be tired hearin' abouts Ebonics. I dislikes hearing about it no more. Some momma, she writes me and ax why I don't write no column in Ebonics. I tells...
REAL REASON FOR CRIME’S DECLINE FOUND BEHIND BARS
FBI statistics tell us that there has been a significant drop in serious crime in this country, but crime experts can't agree why. There is no shortage of those who...
IN ANY LANGUAGE, THE HOLIDAYS BE UPON US
Letters, calls, complaints and great thoughts from readers: Louise Morris, Chicago: Maybe I have led a sheltered life, but all this fuss about a black language called Ebonics has me...
WHEN TV NEWS DOES WEATHER, IT TAKES IDIOTIC TO NEW LEVEL
`Look around this joint," Slats Grobnik said. "What do you see?" People. Yes, that's what they are. "And what are they wearing? Clothing. Do I win a prize? "Some got...
AT THE WHITE HOUSE, THEY’LL ALSO KEEP A LIGHT ON FOR YA
As if he hasn't been rapped enough, President Clinton is now being criticized for, of all things, being too hospitable and gracious a host. In recent stories, The Washington Post...
WINDS OF CHANGE FORCING MALE GOLFERS OUT OF THE WOODS
That a devoted husband would spend a large sum of money to erect a gift-bathroom for his wife on a golf course could be taken as evidence that some sexist...
PRACTICALLY PERFECT GIFT IS GREAT, BUT WOULD YOU WANT IT?
Early in our marriage, I bought my wife a fur coat as a Christmas gift. She had never owned so splendid a coat. And the first time she wore it...
IT’S CRYSTAL CLEAR, GOOD ADVICE ISN’T ALWAYS AT HAND
"Everybody who believes in free enterprise and freedom of speech," Slats Grobnik declared, "ought to be speaking up about what these tinhorn politicians are doing to people like my Aunt...