IT DOESN’T PAY FOR BULLS TO TALK ABOUT THEIR SALARIES
It might end tonight, the most exciting and satisfying performance by any sports team we've ever had in Chicago. It has been something we'll always relish. The incredible return of...
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TO BUY OR NOT TO BUY BECOMES A QUESTION OF STYLE AND FITS
When it comes to shopping for clothes, I'm probably typical of many men in that I fear and loathe it. If it's absolutely essential that I buy a garment, I...
AS MEDICARE SINKS, IT’S TIME TO BLAME THE CHICKEN PEOPLE
So, you gonna do your kids a favor," Slats Grobnik asked, "and maybe jump off a bridge or stick your head in the oven?" What a morbid thing to say....
MEDIA HAVE MADE DIANA WHAT SHE IS: PRINCESS OF HYPE
It has been reported in this newspaper that the city of Chicago has gone "gaga" over the visit of Princess Diana. Other news outlets have described it as widespread giddiness,...
WOMEN PACKING HEAT COULD HELP EVEN LOPSIDED SCORES
One of the livelier debates on guns has recently been touched off by Laura Ingraham, a Washington lawyer and conservative essayist. Writing in the Wall Street Journal, Ms. Ingraham expressed...
BULLS PARTY MESSAGE: DON’T DO THE CRIME IF YOU CAN’T DO THE TIME
James Crowley, a concerned resident of the Northwest Side, has sent this letter to Mayor Daley; Jerry Krause, the general manager of the Chicago Bulls; and me. He writes: "News...
TIP TO CANDIDATES: ASK NOT WHAT CURFEW CAN DO FOR YOU
Maybe historians will correct me, but I believe that Bill Clinton is the first president to take a strong public position on the issue of curfews for teenagers. In this...
IT’S TIME TO THROW IN THE TOWEL ON THIS DREAM
Every day the mails carry tons of requests for donations for one cause or another, some worthy, some questionable. But recently several hundred Chicagoans received a plea that some might...
DODGING THE DRAFT ISN’T A WAR WOUND TO CLINTON’S RE-ELECTION
"As a veteran," said Slats Grobnik, "I am proud of my record at ducking KP, playing poker and the long hours I spent drinking beer in the enlisted men's club....
JORDAN BRINGS EVEN NEW YORKERS TO THEIR KNEES
Unlike many grass-roots Americans who live out here in the heartland, I have always grudgingly admired and respected the city of New York and its abrasive residents. True New Yorkers...