Dave Barry

There are two kinds of people in the world, and I am one of them. I'm the kind of person who likes to be on time for things. In fact,...

No doubt you've been waiting to hear about my harrowing experiences during Hurricane Georges. The worst moment came when my body was being tossed around violently, attacked by savage, uncontrollable...

I say it's time our "leaders" in Washington stopped blathering about sex and started paying attention to the issues that really MATTER to this nation, such as whether we should...

So this year, you agreed to host the big family Thanksgiving dinner. Congratulations! You moron! No, seriously, hosting Thanksgiving dinner does NOT have to be traumatic. The key is planning....

At this juncture in the time parameter, we once again proudly present "Ask Mister Language Person," the No. 1 rated language column in the United States according to a recent...

On the weekend that Kenneth Starr released his Official Big Book o' Smut, I went to America's Heartland to see how ordinary citizens were handling the ongoing traumatic national crisis...

Today's topic is: Domestic Tips From Guys. Guys do not get enough credit for being domestic. This is because the people who give OUT the credits for being domestic are--not...

One evening my wife mentioned, casually, that she had been talking to the son of one of her friends, a little boy named Alexander, about his upcoming fourth birthday. "Alexander...

My son is a senior in high school, which means that pretty soon he, like millions of other seniors, will have to make a crucial decision, the consequences of which...

Recently I was at a party hosted by a younger couple, defined as "a couple that had not yet been born when I started worrying about cholesterol." You will never...