Tears welled up in my eyes as I read the recent Tribune article about the dedication of the Archdiocese of Chicago’s memorial
More Top Picks Best Cigar Humidors For The Money
honoring those who have died by suicide and the families who continue to grieve. It is both beautiful and courageous, reflecting how far we have come in understanding mental illness, suicide and God’s compassion for those who suffer.For generations, many families carried not only unimaginable grief but also shame. An award-winning journalist and North Shore native, Meg Kissinger, has written movingly about the judgment and misunderstanding her family experienced following her sister’s suicide, including a nun telling Kissinger at her sister’s wake, “She’s going to hell, you know.” Sadly, hers was not an isolated experience. Too many grieving families encountered condemnation when they most needed compassion.
I was in elementary school when a cousin died under what was then described as “questionable circumstances,” meaning there was uncertainty about whether he would receive a Catholic funeral and burial. I grew up in a deeply Irish Catholic family. Three of my aunts were nuns, many of my cousins became priests, and my parents, siblings and I were all educated by the Jesuits.
I’ll never forget my mother saying that our strongest instinct is to live and that when people die by suicide, they do so because they are desperately ill. She questioned the inequity of allowing notorious mobsters to receive Catholic burials while denying them to people whose deaths resulted from mental illness. Then she said something I have never forgotten: “The Catholic Church will eventually change its antiquated views on suicide.” She was right.
Today, we understand that suicide is most often the tragic consequence of serious mental illness, depression, addiction or overwhelming emotional pain — not a moral failing or a lack of faith. Faith communities increasingly recognize that those struggling with mental illness deserve compassion, treatment and support.
The archdiocese’s memorial is a powerful symbol of that transformation. But symbols are only the beginning.
If we truly want to prevent suicide, we must ensure that young people receive accurate mental health education before they find themselves in crisis. They should learn to recognize the warning signs of depression, anxiety and suicidal thinking; understand that asking for help is an act of strength rather than weakness; and know where to turn — for themselves or for a friend.
At NAMI DuPage, our Ending the Silence program has reached tens of thousands of students throughout DuPage County, and 600 National Alliance on Mental Illness affiliates nationwide now offer it. Presented by people with lived experience of mental illness who share their story of recovery, the program teaches students to recognize warning signs, understand that recovery is possible, and know where to seek help for themselves or a friend. Research consistently shows that the program increases mental health knowledge, reduces stigma and encourages help-seeking. The greatest impact, however, may not be in the information it imparts, but in the hope it inspires.
While many Catholic schools have embraced mental health education, others remain reluctant to invite programs addressing mental illness and suicide, often out of concern that parents may be uncomfortable with the topic. In my seven years as CEO of NAMI DuPage, I have not received a single complaint from a parent after one of our presentations. Instead, we hear from grateful students, educators and families who tell us the program opened conversations that might never have happened.
During one presentation at a Catholic school, we asked students what they would do if they felt overwhelmed by sadness or anxiety. The first response was, “I would pray.” As a person of faith, I believe prayer is always appropriate. But God also gives us physicians, counselors, medications, caring teachers, parents and trusted friends. We pray when we face cancer, yet we also see an oncologist. We pray when we break a bone, yet we also go to the emergency room. Mental illness deserves the same combination of faith, compassion and professional care as every other illness.
The Gospel calls us not only to comfort those who mourn but also to protect the living. That means ensuring every young person knows the signs of depression, anxiety and suicide risk; knows where to turn for help; and understands that seeking treatment is an act of strength, not weakness.
The archdiocese’s memorial beautifully affirms that those lost to suicide are worthy of remembrance, dignity and love. Now we have an opportunity to take the next step.
Imagine if every student in every school — public and private — had mental health education programs that encouraged conversation and offered hope for recovery. Imagine if every young person knew how to help a struggling friend. Imagine how many lives might be changed — or even saved.
The new memorial reminds us that every life is precious. Let us honor those we have lost not only with monuments, but also by ensuring that fewer families experience such heartbreaking loss in the future. The memorial is a beautiful tribute to those we have lost. The greatest tribute we can offer, however, is to save those we still can.
If you or a loved one is experiencing mental health difficulties, help is available. Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. NAMI Chicago can connect you with local resources at 833-626-4244.
Geri McGinn Kerger is the retiring CEO and president of NAMI DuPage, an attorney and a lifelong Catholic.
Submit a letter, of no more than 400 words, to the editor here or email [email protected].
More Top Picks Best Under Desk Ellipticals For Focus