As Memorial Day weekend kicked off Friday, the names of Valparaiso military members who died in the 20th and 21st centuries were read aloud at the service memorial at Foundation Meadows.
“Memorial Day is not just about remembering that sacrifice in a general sense. It is about remembering their names,” U.S. Army veteran Ben Fugate said at the ceremony.
“During my time, I lost three men in my platoon, Sergeant (Alejandro) Dominguez from California, Specialist (Joel) Taylor from Pennsylvania, Specialist (James) Yohn, North Carolina,” he said. “They were not just names. They were not just soldiers. They were friends. They were guys I joked with, guys I complained with, and guys I trusted, trusted without questions.
“There’s a lot the military trains for – discipline, teamwork, how to do your job under pressure. But there are some things that it cannot fully compare you for,” Fugate said. “They cannot prepare you for the anxiety that comes before their missions. That quiet moment when everything goes still and your mind starts running through all the what-ifs. It cannot prepare you for the weight, the responsibility you feel for the guys and gals standing next to you. And it definitely cannot prepare you for the loss.”
But there are good times, too.
“If I’m being honest, sometimes all the memories are not all heavy. Sometimes they are small ones, ridiculous ones that stick with you. The kind of humor that only makes sense in the military,” Fugate said. “The kind of humor where you’re running on no sleep, covered in dust, and you’re still arguing about whose turn it is to take KP.”
“That kind of humor mattered, and it still does. It is what got us through the hardest days,” he said. “But behind that humor was a bond that is hard to explain unless you have lived it. You learn quickly, you do not take each other for granted, because deep down, you do not have that luxury.”
Fugate thinks about that a lot on Memorial Day. “We live in a country where we can gather like this, speak freely, believe what we want and pursue our own paths,” he said. “Those freedoms, our liberties, are not guaranteed everywhere in the world. They exist here because of sacrifice. Because of the men and women who were willing to give everything bigger than themselves.”
“If you did not know them, that is OK. Just take a moment to recognize what they did. Take a moment. Call someone you have convenience to call. Spend time with your family. Be present, because one of the hardest lessons we learn is that time is not something to get back,” Fugate said.
“I stand here today, not just as a veteran, but as someone who had the privilege of serving alongside incredible people. People who embodied courage, loyalty, and sacrifice that words cannot fully capture. We owe it to them to live well. To appreciate what we have, we can never forget why we have it.”
Valparaiso Mayor Jon Costas pointed out this year is the nation’s 250th anniversary. “Today’s about memory. It’s about duty, gratitude. Remember those who never came home. Those who gave their lives, not for recognition, not for reward, but something greater, greater than themselves, for freedom, for duty, for future generations that they would never meet.
“Because of their courage, because of their sacrifice, we are able to live, work, worship, and raise our families in peace and liberty,” he said.
“Every name remembered, every flag, every place, every moment of silence carries with it the story of a life devoted, protecting others. We honor those stories with humble and grateful hearts,” Costas said.
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Duty and service continue in many forms, he said. Veterans, active-duty military members, police officers, firefighters, paramedics, caregivers and many others quietly and effectively serve us every day.
“Their example reminds us that sacrifice, compassion, and commitment are alive and well in communities like Valparaiso — a grateful community does more than remember once a year, a grateful community that lives in a way that honors sacrifice by caring for one another, by serving others and by working to leave a stronger community for the next generation.”
Kelly Anthony, Northwest Indiana regional director for U.S. Sen. Todd Young, read a message from him.
“As we honor our homeland heroes, let us also recognize the gold star and surviving family members in attendance today who have borne the weight of this sacrifice,” she read. “We thank you for your unwavering support and profound contribution. The lives of your loved ones and the lasting impacts of your family have left an indelible mark on our nation.”
Fugate, Costas and members of the William Henry Harrison chapter of the Daughters of the American Revolution laid wreaths in honor of the fallen while Tom Houts, of Lake County Pipes & Drums, played the bagpipes.
“It’s very meaningful,” Houts said, to perform at ceremonies like the one Friday in Valparaiso.
“I am spending time doing this to honor Memorial Day as opposed to roasting hot dogs,” he said.
The DAR planned to visit Graceland Cemetery, putting flowers on the graves of 50 former DAR members, as well as other area cemeteries throughout the weekend, Vice Regent Cheryl Higer said.
Doug Ross is a freelance reporter for the Post-Tribune.