The idea of joining a service organization with your mom may not be the first thing most teenage boys would consider doing, but 18-year-old Tyler Rose found there were hidden benefits when he did just that. Not only did he make new friends but he learned some handy tips before leaving for college.
Tyler, a Naperville Central High School graduate, is now a freshman at Carthage College in Kenosha, Wisconsin. His mother, Wendy, is serving her second year as president of the Naperville chapter of the Young Men’s Service League and Tyler’s 16-year-old brother, Jacob, is now a member.
Tyler admits he wasn’t excited about the organization initially. “I remember complaining the whole way there,” he said with a laugh.
But before long he was making friends with teens from other Naperville schools and learning useful things, like how to cook for himself using minimal ingredients.
“It helped my creativity and it was nice meeting a lot of people I would never have met,” he said.
More Top Picks Tables Plant
The Young Men’s Service League is a national nonprofit organization in which moms and their teenage sons volunteer together to do community service work while the boys are in high school. There are 132 chapters across 18 states, with 12,500 moms and 13,000 young men participating.
There are myriad benefits beyond helping the community. The mothers build stronger relationships with their sons and get to spend time with them and the sons gain a passion for service and learn skills, including leadership, which help them as they move on to the next phase of their lives.
Wendy says it’s given her a new way to connect with her sons. Her youngest son Caleb, 13, is already looking forward to it, she said.
“The high school years go by so quickly,” she said. “YMSL provides a way for me and my sons to serve in the community together when we might not have taken the time to plan something. It is amazing to watch the impact their serving makes on our community and how it impacts them personally.”
The Naperville chapter is currently full, with more than 200 members.
“We serve at a variety of places together,” she said. “We have baked cookies for the residents of Ronald McDonald house, filled rice packs at Feed My Starving Children, packed care packages for troops at Operation Support Our Troops, went on a scavenger hunt with A Special Place, (which works with) individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities, just to name a few.”
One of Wendy and Tyler’s favorite activities was collecting golf balls left on the range at Naperville’s Springbrook Golf Course.
“We picked up thousands of golf balls from the range over two hours and seemed to have done anything by the end,” she said, laughing.
The Naperville chapter is currently the only one in Illinois.
“The YMSL is a big organization out of Texas,” she said. “Dallas is completely saturated and they are very well known there, but we are the only chapter in Illinois.”
In a time when groups are being encouraged to be more inclusive, I was surprised the league is only for moms and their sons. But, as it turns out, there is a version for moms and daughters called the National Charity League.
Laura Miller participated in that program with her daughter, Ellie, before she went to college. Now she’s enjoying the YMSL with her 17-year-old son, Ian.
“I’ve enjoyed cleaning up yards,” Ian said. “I like making a difference in the community and see the people I am actually helping. I’ve helped Normal Moments, who work with the medically fragile, with lawn services. It gives those families a break.”
Alex Bird,17, is currently a member of YMSL with his mom, Tina.
“I enjoy getting to know boys from other schools; that’s how me and Ian met, picking up shotgun shells on the park district shooting range,” he said. “I enjoyed going to Feed My Starving Children. It’s an organization where we all pack food which sent to countries in Africa to feed children.
“It feels like you are making a direct impact. Me and my mom helped DuPage seniors. We raked a bunch of leaves for an elderly couple who couldn’t do it themselves, and we’ve also done Meals on Wheels.”
Tina says her motivation is purely selfish.
“As a boy mom, it gets harder and harder to gain their attention and (get them to) do things with you,” she said. “I did it to have my son help and do service and so we could do it together. I wanted to spend more time with my son.”
Not only is it great to interact with teens, she said, but committing to service work is a good thing to do. She learned about the organization through a neighbor who was part of it when she lived in Dallas, she said.
“In one of the Texas chapters, they even have a custodian grandmother who takes part with her grandson,” Tina said. “I think this works because moms and sons don’t usually do as much together. Sons usually have sports in common with their dads. I’m glad to have alone time with my son.”
Hilary Decent is a freelance journalist who moved to Naperville from England in 2007.
More Top Picks Steelcase Think