Looking a lot like inmates in a southern prison, we shuffled through the rat’s maze of ropes and poles movie theaters use to keep us away from everything except the popcorn counter.
Believe it or not, even with smartphones and other electronic gizmos, some people still do banking in person.
But only a fool goes on Saturday. And there I was.
Not fair. Some people bank on Saturday because that’s the only day they can get there.
Maybe that’s why this woman was banking on Saturday. She was an older lady, short, frail and she pushed a walker in front of her. She moved very slowly as she entered the rat’s maze.
No one let her go ahead. In line, she was right behind the guy who was right behind me.
He was fit and 40-ish. I turned to him and asked: Why don’t we let the lady go first?
“I’m in a hurry,” he said and strode toward the teller.
You miserable SOB, I shouted at him as the other customers applauded.
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OK, OK I didn’t shout anything of the kind. I was raised properly, and one doesn’t shout SOB at an SOB in public.
But, I wanted to.
All I did was say, though, and not too loud was: “Hey, if you’re in a hurry, what else matters?”
The other customers didn’t applaud. They just looked up, looked down, looked sideways, just looked away.
Well, at least I could let the lady go ahead of me. That would be something.
When I told her she should go next, she looked thunderstruck, “You mean you’re letting me go ahead of you?”
She thanked me and began the long, slow push toward the next open teller.
She apparently wasn’t fast enough for the teller, who shouted, “Step up, please!”
This time I did shout: She’s coming as fast as she can.
The teller said, “Oh.”
Well, I finally did my banking. The 40-ish guy still was conducting his very important business. But, I waited for him and we had words. He apologized and promised to be more considerate in the future.
OK, OK, I didn’t really have words with him. And he’ll remain a jerk for the rest of his life.
Then I went to the grocery store.
Now, there’s another place only a fool goes on Saturday.
Paul Sassone is a freelance columnist for Pioneer Press.