Q: You’re out at dinner, and one of the people you’re dining with sneezes — and not into his or her sleeve. How should you react?
Unless your goal is to teach a lesson, don’t react: It’s too late, and there’s nothing you can do to take the sneeze back. Anything you say will simply challenge the person’s sense of public hygiene.
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It’s also important to consider the culture of the sneezer. In many parts of Asia, sneezing onto the street is the norm. In a high-class restaurant in Latin America or Latin Europe, one would never soil clothes with a sneeze (better to just sneeze into your hand), and when in the deserts of North Africa, sneezing into the tagelmust or keffiyeh (different head coverings) is a blessed way to keep the sand out — and keep breathing!
Maybe that’s why most cultures respond to a sneeze with a wish for divine intervention (“God bless you!”), something you might wish for the next time your dining companion sneezes at the table!”
— Dean Foster, expert on culture in business and author of the “Global Etiquette Guide” series
Yikes and yuck! Does your face register disgust, surprise or amusement? Do you shift uncomfortably in your seat? More than 60 percent of our communication is nonverbal, so you could simply hope that your dinner mate reads the cues. Should you complain verbally? Let’s start with the facts:
A sneeze can travel up to 100 mph. Ask yourself, was that sneeze a surprise to my dinner mate as well? Knowing it may have been a mistake, your empathy might mitigate your horror.
A sneeze can spread a ton of germs — as many as 100,000. If someone sneezed on your meal, it’s toast.
You can use your body to signal, “Hey, that was not cool.” Or use your words to send a message: “Gesundheit. May I offer you an antibacterial wipe?” Or you can just be chill. Whether your dinner mate is friend, colleague or foe, some people might simply tell you, “It’s a sneeze. Live with it.”
— Dr. Lynne Kenney, pediatric psychologist and author of “The Family Coach Method: Raising Good, Kind, Ethical Kids”
Haley Hinkle is a freelancer.
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