If you can put a unique and entertaining spin on someone else’s song, well-done covers can be the best part of any live set. Sometimes however, people like Ed from the party last Friday come in with an acoustic guitar and an all-too-earnest (or worse, all-too-ironic) cover of Beyonce’s “Drunk In Love” and ruin everyone’s fun. Do you want to be fun-ruiner Ed from the party last Friday? No, you do not.
There are loads of artists who do covers well: Acts like Glen Hansard, Natalie Prass, Chance the Rapper, James Blake, the Replacements and Arcade Fire, to a name an extremely small few, often add well-timed, well-placed versions of other material that never feel forced or pandering. It’s a tricky thing to get right, but if you want to be like those artists, you’d best start by avoiding these songs.
1. Old Crow Medicine Show, “Wagon Wheel”
This is a great song, but please, no more. Technically a cover because it started out as a Bob Dylan sketch until Virginia Americana outfit Old Crow Medicine Show made the song its own, “Wagon Wheel” is probably playing at some open mic or campfire as we speak. Though it’s got a timeless melody and the chord progression is pretty easy to get down, man, it’s been over 10 years of “Wagon Wheel” over-saturation. Also, if I hear one more person say Hootie from Hootie and the Blowfish was responsible for this song rather than just merely covering it, I’m going to send a snarky tweet or something about it. So yeah, watch out!
2. Leonard Cohen, “Hallelujah”
If I can list over five excellent covers of one song, that means the window has pretty much closed on anyone else trying it out right? It’s a beautifully written song, but if you’re not sure your falsetto can soar as high as Jeff Buckley’s or are as capable at setting a mood as Leonard Cohen or have the same spiritual gravitas as David Bazan or boast the musical dexterity of John Cale, it might be best to take a shot at something less…ambitious.
3. Any pop or hip-hop song you think needs a fucking ukulele
I started writing about music because I am first and foremost a fan. I love music and want music to stay good and because of this, I must tell you that earnest ukulele covers of hip-hop and pop songs are music’s No. 1 threat. This kind of awfulness predates Ed Sheeran. Spend enough time down a YouTube spiral searching “ukulele cover rap” and you’ll be guaranteed to take a break from the Internet for a while. Fun fact: There are 17,600 YouTube results for “trap queen ukulele.”
4. Green Day, “Brain Stew”
Nothing says “Good evening, Naperville Central High, this is our first concert and we learned how to play these instruments a couple weeks ago” like covering this Green Day song.
5. Oasis, “Wonderwall”
Quick, stop reading this joke article because Chad is out on the quad with his Ibanez playing this song before the Frisbee game.
6. John Lennon, “Imagine”
There’s really no way to sing this song, which Frank Turner accurately called “a Hallmark card set to music,” without sounding sappy—like an “NBC Cares” infomercial or something. Despite the song’s ubiquity, Lennon had better material, and if you decide to add “Imagine” to your setlists, you’re going to sound like a cornball.
7. Any Beatles song
While we’re at it, we might as well add every single Beatles song to this list. The Beatles are great. Are you as good as the Beatles? When given the choice, would we want to hear your ska-flavored take on “With A Little Help From My Friends” or should we just revisit freaking “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band”?
8. An updated “We Didn’t Start The Fire”
“And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.” — Friedrich Nietzsche
9. Fleetwood Mac, “Landslide”
The Dixie Chicks and Smashing Pumpkins’ versions are fine, and yours will be less than that. You’ll be lucky if you can top the “Glee” rendition.
10. “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”
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Man, if you think your take on “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” is going to be “The Wizard of Oz” of awesome throwback songs to tackle, it’ll probably end up as the “Oz the Great and Powerful.”
[email protected], @joshhterry
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