I never met him, but I can only assume the guy who coined the phrase “it’s a jungle out there” must have been a suburban resident.
In the last two weeks, we’ve come face-to-face with no less than three opossums, two skunks, a raccoon and a wandering house cat for good measure – all in our own fenced yard, which is squarely situated inside the middle of what one might think to be an otherwise seemingly wildlife-free zone. Oh, contraire. As many of you can likely also share from your tales of scurrying tails, that is but only the beginning.
Coyote sightings also have become increasingly common throughout the suburbs over the decades. You can see them along the railroad tracks at night sometimes, as you might expect, but also in yards, cul-de-sacs and common areas, as you probably wouldn’t. On occasion, you can even catch glimpse of them in daylight hours, an indication of their increasing comfort level around people. Owners of small dogs and other household pets be warned.
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That’s not all. One of our earliest memories in our home is of the beastly creature that ventured out from under our shed to graze in our backyard – a woodchuck, a.k.a. “groundhog.” Not to mention the bats, geese, rabbits, squirrels and chipmunks, et al. that are seemingly everywhere, whether we see them as a nuisance or not.
According to the City of Naperville’s Animal Control division, birds actually topped the list of the most common cause of calls to Animal Control in 2014 with 532, followed by raccoons (354), coyotes (281) and skunks (268). From personal experience, we all know those are but a small fraction of the numbers of each that are actually teeming about. Skunkings of dogs has become so common in our neighborhood that between dusk and dawn our dog only goes out on a leash, skunks being primarily nocturnal. Of course, we only have to do this during peak skunk season, which now seems to run roughly January through December.
Our current dog has not endured the odoriferous attack of a skunk, but our last dog did – twice. I worked second shift at the time, so I wasn’t around for either, leaving my wife, neighbors and father-in-law tending to the pooch’s oily mess. But it was enough to make us all go to great lengths to avoid repeat occurrences. And for any of you old “Partridge Family” fans out there, let me tell you, tomato juice does not work – unless your goal is to have a dog that smells like skunk and tomato juice. Dish soap is a far better remedy to cut through the oil and cleanse the odor from your dog’s fur more quickly and effectively.
Two years ago a randy stench of skunks (how appropriate is THAT collective noun) took up residence under our front porch, seemingly with the express purpose of more emerging from the den than how many went in. Hubba hubba! Blech. We humanely trapped five and filled in the hole, once assured that all had vacated, and friends politely resisted telling us how much our home reeked from the whole affair. Again, enough to make sure that doesn’t happen again.
Thankfully we’ve not had a repeat occurrence, though our neighbor’s dog did tangle with one in their yard two weeks ago. The dog survived – miraculously unsprayed even – though the skunk did not. Days later our dog stared one down at night in our backyard, before the critter decided to crawl back under the fence and leave. Thankfully.
The even more common nuisance du jour of late seems to be the opossums, routinely patrolling our yard like clockwork each night when the dog goes out for her final walk. Skulking through our flower beds out front, sneaking along the side of the house, or perched atop a fence as one particularly Wallenda-like critter was late one night this week, they’re seemingly everywhere.
Now, understand, I know I’m the man of the house, the traditional “hunter-gatherer” role, if you will. But I won’t. One look at one of these creepy creatures and I’m hunting and gathering – hunting for cover and hoping to gather myself. Sure, they’re more afraid of us than we are of them, evidenced by how the thing “played possum,” sitting motionless on the fence once it knew the dog and I had spotted it, but who really wants any part of tangling with one of those if you don’t have to?
Of course, there are things we can do to lessen the chances of wildlife invasions on our property – keep window wells covered and sealed, don’t leave food and water bowls out for pets that could attract critters instead, don’t store garbage cans outside other than on garbage night, etc. But nothing short of erecting fortress-like walls with barbed wire, alarms and gun turrets is sure to keep everything out. Not that we’d advocate the gun thing anyway, merely for show. For more information on wildlife issues around your home, visit the Animal Control section of the City of Naperville website at http://www.naperville.il.us/animalcontrol.aspx.
If the current pace of things is any indication, the coming years will only bring more such animals closer and closer to our homes. We upset their habitats by building and building and building, so it’s only logical that they would return the favor in proportional abundance.
No matter. Humans have lived alongside our furry brethren for thousands of years, adapting many times along the way. Surely we have every reason to believe that will continue, right?
If not, there’s always the gun turrets.
Twitter: @RobManker
Rob Manker is a freelance writer who lives, works, parents in Naperville.