It requires a significant time commitment, continuous work and a lack of procrastination to be successful. Not pulling the trigger to address an obvious need or hole can result in letdown, heartbreak and great loss, where you are left second-guessing your choices and wondering where it all went wrong.
No, for once I’m not talking about the art of managing your fantasy football team. I’m talking about managing your relationship with your significant other and making love work with them … DURING THE FANTASY FOOTBALL SEASON. Now before you think I’m going to go “Dr. Phil” on you, don’t put this article on waivers just yet. My advice this week is simple: Channel that same passion and desire that drive you to be a fantasy football pundit and you will be a champion in the game of love.
The Sunday inactive technique
Sunday at 11 a.m.—the time most of us vanish from our significant others into the fantasy football black hole, obsessively scouring the waiver wire, blaring ESPN’s Fantasy Football Now and searching the Web for player inactive reports. At some point during the fantasy football season, pretend your significant other’s wants are your fantasy football lineup badly needing attention. Do the research, pack your lineup full of can’t-miss winners (in terms of activities they love doing) and wait for the score (figuratively and perhaps literally). Then do the ultimate: Declare yourself inactive from fantasy football on Sunday (preferably on a week your roster is static) to show them that they matter most.
Stop obsessing over seeing a Boobie
Running back Boobie Dixon, that is. Players like him are a short-term fix to a solution. To make love work, you need to think beyond the one-week fix and play the matchups week-to-week. Washing the dishes without being asked might be the fantasy equivalent of tight end Gary Barnidge scoring a touchdown and racking up 139 receiving yards one week, but it also could be a complete nonstarter like Sammy Watkins has been the next.
Show your sensitive side
Offer to watch a romantic movie, and when that sad or tender moment requiring tears comes, imagine owning Jamaal Charles (like I do) and the waterworks should flow easily. Given all the NFL injuries this season, I recommend watching “The Fault in Our Stars.” The title is appropriate, Shailene Woodley is cute and you’ll show you are capable of being “Divergent.”
Never suggest a three-way
Someone always gets short-changed. Don’t think you can satisfy both their needs and your fantasy needs at the same time, even if you’re sure one will just take a few seconds. If you have reserves (on your bench), you can’t tap into them once the game has started. Use common sense.
Soxman is a RedEye contributor.