I get it. We live in America. We’ll stand up for our right to drink booze at Taco Bell. We’ll support weird food combinations that just make sense (looking at you, sushi burrito). Heck, we’ll even try black-colored hamburger buns if a major fast-food chain says it’s OK. It makes total sense that McDonald’s is now offering an all-day breakfast menu. Why shouldn’t we be able to order hotcakes at 10 p.m.?
That’s exactly what I did last night. But to be honest with you, it was kind of a major disappointment.
I waltzed into McDonald’s after a “wine night with the girls,” aka I was four glasses deep and had had my fill of cheese and salami. I was excited when I spotted their all-day breakfast menu and promo items hanging around the store and figured I should make the most of the opportunity. I ordered three of the eight options available on the special menu: An Egg McMuffin ($3.19), three hotcakes ($2.69) and a hash brown ($1). I forked over my cash—less than $10 for the whole lot—and waited. And waited. And waited some more.
The employee behind the counter was working feverishly to sling fries, package hotcakes, toss 20 chicken nuggets in a box, top a shake with whipped cream and blend a frappe. It looked like total chaos. I wasn’t annoyed with the service, I just felt bad that she was busting her butt to package dinner for some and breakfast for others. But that wasn’t the problem.
The longer I waited, the more I realized I just wanted a small order of fries and a box of chicken nuggets. To me, that’s my late-night, twice-a-year jam at McDonald’s. And while I have a true appreciation for the freedom to eat breakfast for dinner, it’s not really what I was craving on a Tuesday night after a few glasses of wine. I don’t imagine it will be what I crave on a Saturday night on my way home from the bars, either. Let’s be honest: Those breakfast items really hit the spot at about 11 a.m. on a Sunday morning when you’re too hungover to go to a normal brunch spot and socialize like a human being.
Wicker Park Taco Bell’s boozy menu was more of a weird novelty that demanded to be tried (and it was well worth the wait), but I’d be lying if I said McDonald’s filled the same void for me. Sure, the hotcakes were better than I remembered and the hash brown was a crispy bundle of joy that should be worshipped, but will I venture back for those menu items late at night? Probably not. In a city where we have so many options, McDonald’s all-day menu is a great exercise of our right to eat breakfast for dinner. But sometimes it’s nice to stick to the basics and not have all the extra noise. And by basics, I’m clearly talking about my beloved chicken nuggets and fries. This one’s for you, guys.
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