A quick scan of the room at Bric-a-Brac Records in Logan Square reveals a row of action figures from the movie “Alien” (including one with his chest burst open), an old “Simpsons” arcade game that looks either broken or at least unplugged, a glass case full of troll dolls that surely is the envy of the city’s most diligent bingo players, vintage buttons that recall ’80s rock bands like AC/DC and Blondie, and so much more. A cutout image of Elvira with her trademark smirk is posted to a door, appropriately faded. Amid the memorabilia, there are also rows and rows of records. There are also comedians.
The room is a who’s who of the city’s youngest up-and-comers — including Rachel McCartney, who is trying to remember her few lines, Dan Sheehan and J. Michael Osborne who are filling up their gullets — and fouling up the air — with McDonalds, Chicago comic Steven King in a wig that’s meant to make him look like Randy Newman (although he looks more like Andy Warhol with a perm), and many others. The occasion is “Dandelo Goes to Hell: A Birthday Roast Spooktacular.” The roast is honoring the dog Dandelo, a sweet-faced Corgi who is turning six today and scampering around the store in blissful ignorance. The “spooktacular” part is a nod to Friday the 13th.
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The show is a departure from “Desperate Collectors,” a monthly stand-up comedy showcase produced by Nick Martin, Luke Evans Flip and Sam Deeran. Tonight’s roast is a slapdash affair. It requires audiovisuals and there is a moment of uncertainty as to whether or not the appropriate tech is even available. There is no dais present for the roasters (perhaps because there are nearly 30 on hand) and much of the humor is slapstick as opposed to cutting one-liners aimed at the roasted’s most stereotypical features — of which dogs have many.
But the evening has its moments. There is a well-dressed Abby Stassen who, in the role of ex-girlfriend, delivers a few solid zingers with poise and efficiency. “Dandelo and I dated for six of the most magical months of my life … three and half years of his.” There is also Kaitlyn Grissom: “You could’ve been a Golden Retriever like the rest of your family,” she says, “but I guess you gave up on growing legs.” Rudy Schultz, whose hair and mustache are always impeccable, delivers his lines with the bark (no pun intended) of Comedy Central roast master Jeffrey Ross — and using many unprintable profanities. Tyler Snodgrass, meanwhile, does a sly version of the famous dirty joke “The Aristocrats” but of course is renamed here as “The Aristocats” while Dave Losso’s confident slurs are ebulliently pun-filled: “Dandelo’s involved in these weird sex parties after they close [Bric-a-Brac] every night,” he says. “It’s like ‘Eyes Wide Mutt.'” But the best part is when the microphone is handed to the contented dog for several awkward minutes of silent rebuttal.
Valentine’s Day weekend may seem like an odd time to launch a new comedy room, but this is the case for the River North fixture the Comedy Bar which recently ditched its digs at nightclub Ontourage in favor of the top floor of the Gino’s East at LaSalle and Illinois streets. This might be a sly move as the heavy foot traffic at Gino’s on weekends should give the room — which includes a full dinner menu — a boost.
The Comedy Bar is celebrating its grand opening with an all-headliner night of comedy that includes Ali Clayton, Derek Smith, Kevin Williams and Sean Flannery. All are in fine form.
Williams also has a bunch of good ones the room is eating right up. Go see him when he headlines the Comedy Bar March 13-14. “I got roaches and they’ve taken over,” he says.”The other day I caught one signing for the UPS package. I was like, ‘I got this. Go get back in the cereal and stay out of the Raisin Bran, I can’t tell the difference.'”
Lastly there is Flannery. “As a transplant [to Chicago,] it makes no sense when you come up here because you guys for one reason or another decided to nickname all of your highways,” he says in his Midwest drawl. “Everything is named after a bishop or a president. Whenever I hear the traffic report in Chicago it sounds like they’re explaining how the Vietnam War started.”
At a recent installment of “Around the Corner Comedy,” a newish monthly showcase at Miska’s Liquors in Roscoe Village, I am way too sleepy for a night of jokes, but they’ve assembled a lineup that perks me right up, including two Davids. “I found this out on Christmas,” says David Rader. “I’m the only grandchild still receiving money from my grandmother. I am the middle of five grandchildren.” Yeah, we’ve all been there.
There is also David Philips. “I grew up kind of poor which is not the same thing as actually poor,” he says. “Kind of poor is you eat all the junk food you want, but it was the off-brand stuff like Mexican Triangle Chips and Associate’s Degree Pepper.”
Our headliner is Danny Kallas who in recent years has emerged as one of the most sure-footed comedians in the city — and one that is unlikely to leave anytime soon. “One in five 13-year-olds smoke,” says Kallas. “Isn’t that sad? Because it means that four of five 13-year-olds are nerds,” and also, “I have OCD, obsessive compulsive disorder disorder disorder.” Good one.
UPDATE: An earlier version of this column misspelled the names of comedians Dave Losso, Rudy Schultz, David Rader and David Philips. The Tribune regrets the errors.