Whether you celebrate Valentine’s Day or just ignore all the red and pink this month, one cannot deny that this holiday has an interesting history and truly is embraced by many.
Since Valentine’s Day fell on the weekend this year, you can be sure it is being celebrated all weekend long. I asked my readers to share their reflections about the tradition of Valentine’s Day and I received many varied responses.
Sister Ann Marie Klasky reminded me of the story of the man behind the holiday and shared, “I try to educate people as to who the REAL St. Valentine is on this holiday. His story is attractive and, hopefully, reminds people that God is love!”
St. Valentine was a third century Roman priest who stood up to the reigning “bullies” – particularly Emperor Claudius – who issued an edict forbidding the marriage of young people. The emperor’s rationale was that unmarried soldiers fought better than those who had marital ties and worried about family left behind. Valentine performed many secret Christian marriages and was eventually caught, imprisoned and tortured for his actions.
Legend is that while imprisoned, Valentine often got notes out to his loved ones – with the assistance of a dove that frequently sat on his cell window. His simple message would say, “Remember your Valentine.” Another legend credits him with the miraculous cure of the blind daughter of his jailer. She frequently visited Valentine, and while he spoke to her about God’s love, the young girl saw a bright light and regained her sight.
As a result, St. Valentine remains the patron saint of lovers. His feast day is Feb. 14 since that was the day of his execution in 278 A.D.
Modern-day observation of Valentine’s Day usually involves the giving of cards, candy and flowers as signs of love and affection.
But while most see it as an opportunity to display their feelings to others, some folks feel it has become too commercialized.
Enza Piech shared that, when she was a CCD (catechism) teacher, “We used to spend time learning about the saint and would write Valentine’s cards to our soldiers. That seemed to be a better expression of care and affection.”
Jan Sulek said, “The day is what you make it. It is certainly mostly overcommercialized but also an opportunity to do something special for a loved one.”
Patti Smith said, “I always felt it was a ‘Hallmark day’ made up for profit by (card, candy and flower) companies. If we want to celebrate our love for others, we can do that any time and every day.”
Kathy Mazurek said, “My husband and I have stopped going out for dinner on Valentine’s Day years ago as it’s too crowded and restaurants increase dinner prices on that day. We celebrate our own day with the little things … a card, flowers and maybe some candy.”
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Jack Winegar, somewhat tongue-in-cheek, said, “Year after year, I keep asking my wife to go to the white tablecloth service at White Castle on Valentine’s Day. She has yet to accept.”
Hopefully, she will read this and next year you will be luckier, Jack.
On the same note, Ginny Lopez said, “We don’t celebrate. Along about the 11th of February, my husband will ask, ‘When’s Valentine’s Day again?’ I ask you, where’s the romance in that??”
I had two interesting responses from readers who have experience in the floral business.
Cheryl Orlowski, owner of Heather and Vine in Indian Head Park, defended the role of florists in Valentine’s Day. She said, “Valentine’s Day has been around forever – unlike the newer holidays like Sweetest Day or Grandparents Day, which are more like ‘Hallmark holidays.’ Everyone needs a little more love in their life, even if it is just for one day. Sometimes we just need an excuse to share the love!”
Tom Cech had a 23-year career in the wholesale floral industry. His response comes from his memory of struggling to respond to the demands every Valentine’s Day. He told me, “Regardless of the source of your flowers, the climate is against you. The perfect rose you give your sweetheart on Valentine’s Day is a survivor. It’s lived through more problems than most relationships ever will survive and will become a memory quickly. That memory is the reason Valentine’s Day exists and continues to thrive among commercialization.”
Other readers told of unique traditions of their own.
Jim Sieferman said, “Connie and I usually find a pizza place with heart-shaped pizzas – just like the one where we got engaged at Barnaby’s in Cal City on 2/14/79.”
John Kappel continued his father’s tradition while his kids were young.
“I used to get a box of candy for the kids and a card for each, just like my dad did,” he said.
Pat Shepard’s husband John has bought her roses on Valentine’s Day for the past 31 years. She plans a special meal – usually lobster and a homemade dessert.
“Other than that, it’s a quiet evening spent together,” Shepard said.
Finally, Kim Dearth said, “Of course I believe in Valentine’s Day. Feeling love and giving love is one of the very best parts of life. We should all celebrate the good people that God has placed in our lives. I love and appreciate all of you, my Bob, my girls, my family, my friends and my God.”
I cannot help but think of the unique way that my mother and father – Emily and Frank Leszczynski – celebrated love on Valentine’s Day weekend back in 1941 when they were wed on Feb. 15. That day also happened to be the 10th birthday of Mom’s younger sister, Dolores Palusis, whom Mom chose as one of her bridesmaids. What a special way to celebrate the love only sisters can share.
Happy Valentine’s Day to all!
Reggie Sabadosa is a freelance columnist.