Chicago radio stations are already playing Christmas music, so why not drop a new holiday song before Thanksgiving?
That’s apparently the thinking behind Kristen Bell and acapella group Straight No Chaser’s “Text Me Merry Christmas,” which found its way online Friday. Let’s get one thing out of the way first: If it wasn’t Kristen Bell singing an ode to texting loved ones on the holidays, this musical drivel would probably be tossed in the discard pile. But because it IS adorable, sloth loving Kristen Bell, it’s just OK enough to earn some attention.
Go ahead and judge for yourself, but there’s somethings we couldn’t help but overlook:
More Top Picks Ssds
Is this really what things have come to? Are Christmas cards dead? Is it too hard to call grandma? You haven’t called her in months, you know.
There is no keyboard in the video typing and sending the text messages. We’re not buying that holiday magic mumbo-jumbo.
The lyric “I’ll be right here waiting/For my pants to start vibrating” has no place in a Christmas song.
What about Kwanzaa? Hanukkah? Way to be diverse, Bell.
Whatever. Get ready to hear your younger cousins singing this ad nauseum and seeing this thing plastered all over your Facebook wall for the forseeable future. You did this to yourselves, you text obsessed monsters.
Want more? Discuss this article and others on RedEye’s Facebook page.