“Lara Croft Tomb Raider Boobs.”
That was the absolute first dirty Internet search I ever did. Since that day in 1998, or so, the internet and I have been best friends. You know that kind-of-off-a-bit guy at your office who’s seen every single video ever of anything?
That’s me.
So I’ve taken it upon myself to start a little roundup of Internet each week. I’m calling it “Mick’s Tape.”
Basically, I’ll hang out in the bowels of web and post what I find every Wednesday. Also I probably will include links to some RedEye stuff because, let’s be honest, we do some good stuff here. I promise.
If this dog could talk, he would basically say “Woof! Here’s your iPhone! I found it on the plane and returned it to you using only the scent of your plane farts! Arf!” No but seriously, the company says in the video that the dog is trained to sniff out folks who left their sh*t on an airplane. Even if KLM airlines is shamelessly using an adorable puppy to shill for it’s brand or even if it’s fake, it’s amazing. (UPDATE: As Mashable points out, it is fake and KLM is using a puppy to shill for its brand. Don’t care, it’s still adorable.)
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I watched a documentary a few weeks ago about Koala sex, and I haven’t really been the same since. It’s called “Sex in the Wild” and it’s on PBS. They interviewed a guy who basically made the koala equivalent of a Fleshlight. (NSFW. If you don’t know what that is, you’ll have to Google it. Sorry.) It’s fascinating. Anyway this video made me feel a little better about things.
This is what a $1,000 sundae looks like, in case you were wondering. You can buy it in Chicago. I mean, f*ck it, right? It’s a three-paycheck month, and my landlord has been getting sloppy about cashing checks on time anyway.
It looks like 21-year-old Jasmine Tredevil and her surgically implanted bonus-breast, which made its rounds on the internet, is fake. According to TMZ, three-nip’s bag was stolen at a Tampa airport a while back, and cops listed a “three-breast prosthesis” among the missing items. I wonder if Tredevil has ever seen “Total Recall”?
“But I also value Humboldt Park as a historic neighborhood park that is used on a daily basis by members of the neighborhood, and this level of destruction is disturbing,” YouTube user Jason Jenkins wrote in the description of this post-Riot Fest video of Humboldt Park. Organizers have promised to restore it to better-than-before status, but it really does look like a hot mess.
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