Flights are late or canceled; American Airlines wants to charge to check luggage; a new survey showed air passenger satisfaction has hit the skids — is there any chance the airline industry can make customers happy again? Convening at a central location (by bus), The Tempo Subcommittee for Aviation Innovation applied its brainstorming prowess to this jet-fueled crisis. We suggest:
Express lost luggage. Why wait for the airline to lose your luggage when you can pick its destination in advance? Choose one of 50 cities including Honolulu, Paris or Scranton, Pa.
Frequent fryer miles. Get $10 off your ticket for every hour spent in the galley prepping meals for the fine folks in first class.
Self-serve gas. Passengers take turns pumping jet fuel to earn a discount.
Exercise bikes. A healthier, roomier alternative to stiff-backed seats. Passengers can power in-flight movies and microwave ovens. Non-participants get cold cuts.
Dancing bear. Exit and board to the sight of a dancing bear. The dude stuck in the costume is the airline CEO.
Three-packs of air-sickness bags. Open up, there’s a prize inside.
Adventure flights. Board by rope ladder, disembark by water slide. Those wishing to parachute to their final destination must contact the FAA.
Replace in-flight movies with singalongs. Coffee, tea or “My Fair Lady”?
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