Wedding season is here. Plans that have been germinating for months are becoming reality — though not always as scripted.
With that in mind, we thought couples still in the planning stages might benefit from the advice of you who have been through this mill. So we asked married couples: What would you change about your weddings? Your answers reflect high comedy, tender insight and everything in between.
— Pam Becker
Mishaps aplenty
If we were planning our wedding now, there are a number of things we would do differently.
We would not have used a paper runner on the grass as an aisle — although seeing the entire wedding party’s high heels getting stuck during the procession was pretty humorous on the wedding video.
We would have had the pricey Lladro cake topper anchored securely on the cake. This would have prevented its tumbling down and shattering during my parent’s speech at the reception. And my mother-in-law wouldn’t have had the honors of kicking the groom’s head across the floor during her speech. My stepfather was able to glue the pieces of the Lladro together for a memento, minus the groom’s head, which was never found.
Finally, we would have had a receiving line before the reception instead of having to greet our guests table by table during dinner. This would have prevented our late-night stop at Wendy’s in our wedding attire.
— Lisa White, Cary
First, I would never, ever have permed my hair two weeks before my wedding day. What was I thinking? Probably that the humidity would flatten my hair and I was going to do everything possible to prevent that. Well, I did, and the wedding pictures are proof of that!
Second, why did I pick a dress with long sleeves? June 21st is the first day of summer. And yes, it was hot — record-breaking hot.
At one point during the evening when I bent my arm the sleeve seam ripped, and my bridesmaid had to sew my sleeve back together with my hot, sweaty arm inside!
And finally, I bit off all my nails and had to have an emergency nail appointment. The color I picked was a coral, and acrylic nails back then were not as, let’s say, realistic as they are today. I have to chuckle at the close-up of our new rings and my so totally fake nails!
— Cathy Ahern, Hinsdale
Timing is everything
Why didn’t anyone tell me seven years ago that the last thing the chosen ones on my guest list would want to do in the middle of a three-day holiday weekend is go to my wedding?
A bit of advice for those planning holiday weekend soirees: No matter how much you think your friends and former co-workers love you, their annual family barbecues and Labor Day excursion to Wisconsin to “close up the cabin” always trumps your wedding.
— Amy Jo Steinbruecker, Bloomingdale
Where’s the TiVo?
The afternoon of our wedding Notre Dame was playing Army. It was a nail-biter, and the groom, groomsmen and the priest were glued to the TV in the rectory. Even though the scheduled time for the wedding had arrived, they were not about to budge.
In the meantime, the bride and her attendants were waiting in the vestibule. The wedding guests began to think the groom had changed his mind. Finally it was halftime, and the wedding started.
We will be celebrating our 60th wedding anniversary this November with our eight children, their spouses and eight grandchildren.
By the way, the Fighting Irish won.
— Alberta O’Brien, Naperville
Contest for most outrageous
More Top Picks How To Raise Hdl Cholesterol Naturally
A week before the ceremony our beautiful wedding cake was delivered to the club, by mistake, of course. The French bakery kindly packed it up and kept their promise to send one to us on [the wedding date]. They kept their promise, but when we cut the cake following the ceremony we realized they had also kept the cake for an entire week and returned it to the wedding party stale and tasteless.
We had selected a beautiful assortment of French pastries for our dessert. I actually went to the sweet table to taste a sample of the goodies, but they were nowhere to be seen. A cousin told me a couple of weeks later that a guest had brought big boxes to the wedding. She said, “If we don’t take them, the help will eat it all.”
— Phoebe Medow, Chicago
Too much hoopla
We had a reception for 200 people, half of whom we did not know, instead of a small intimate dinner for our families, best man and maid of honor. My mother told me I would regret it for the rest of my life if I didn’t have the big hoopla-la, but instead I have always regretted not having the wedding I wanted because I am very shy, do not like having my picture taken and have a hard time mingling with people.
— Mary MacKenzie, Frankfort
Dresses from hell
I thought I was so chic picking out floor-length, fuchsia taffeta [bridesmaids] dresses! I believe the prevailing wisdom is that matched dresses will make the photos look nicer. Really? Hideous dresses have never been shown to make the wearer or the bride look more beautiful, although the style will date your wedding faster than the music played at the reception.
If I were to do it again, I would give the bridesmaids a color swatch and ask them to pick a dress, in a similar color, that made them feel absolutely fabulous. It has been proved that when you feel fabulous you look fabulous.
— Jill Baskin, Chicago
Change it, with one exception
I would be sure to leave gift bags at the hotel for all of the out-of-town guests to let them know how much we appreciated their traveling to share our special day.
I would have definitely gone to see the DJ we selected at another wedding reception before signing a contract.
I would have splurged on some of the more frivolous things such as ice sculptures and dessert carts at the reception.
I would have hired a professional videographer.
I would also have included a dinner choice of seafood at our reception during Lent.
I would have taken more pictures with my father, who is no longer with us.
With all of the things I would change or do differently, one thing would remain unchanged: I would definitely choose my husband all over again.
— Jennifer Hockey, Oswego
– – –
Weddings by the numbers
Here is a snapshot of the U.S. wedding scene:
Estimated/projected number of weddings
2.27 million in 2006
2.29 million in 2007
Estimated/projected average cost
$27,710 in July 2006
$28,850 in July 2007
Estimated average cost breakdown per wedding (July 2006)
$14,179 for reception
$3,691 for photography and video
$2,608 for attire
$2,527 for ceremony
More Top Picks Best Gas Powered Chainsaws Under 200
$1,970 for flowers
$953 for music
Source: Bridal Association of America