Energy drinks are my kryptonite. Which is to say, they are both my weakness and a dangerous glowing substance with untold powers. Bulls guard Ben Gordon has put his name on the newest energy drink: BG7 (the 7 would be Gordon’s initials and jersey number), which is available at select 7-Elevens around town. I wonder if it would help me, as the can claims, “get clutch?” We pit it in a one-on-one taste-off with the current league MVP, Red Bull.
Red Bull: A taste of fizzy cough syrup with two dozen Sweet Tarts added. This is why people mix it with vodka. It’s meant to be consumed in concert, like daiquiri mix.
BG7: Advertising itself as “White Tea Energy Blast,” there is not one molecule of white tea that I could taste. Rather, it conjures up strawberry Starburst. It is still quite sweet, though not to the severity of Red Bull.
Play-by-play: Gordon double-pumps, shoots a 12-footer that bounces off the rim, grabs his own rebound, sneaks around the defender Red Bull and makes a layup underneath the basket. It’s not very efficient for two points, but Gordon gets the score in the end.
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