“What we’re going to be looking at primarily is how to balance your heart and your head,” University of Illinois Extension’s Barbara Linek said of a new five-part relationships course with the ominous title “How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk or Jerkette.”
Nutty headings aside, battling the forces of rational reasoning when you’re head over heels over a possible heel sounds like a tall order.
But the course attempts it with research, problem-solving and workshop techniques. It focuses on showing what a person will be like during a marriage and the bonding elements needed to allow a budding romance to grow.
Instructor Betty Barsley-Marra, who has an undergraduate degree in family relationships and child development and a master’s in instructional leadership, said the course will teach people to familiarize themselves with their special someone before deepening that relationship.
“It takes a long time to get to know someone,” she said, “and if you move ahead before you really know someone, to a next step and a next step and a next step, you’ll get into that very precarious situation where you think, `I know all these bad things are happening in this relationship, and it really isn’t a good match for me, but I’m in luv and now what do I do?'”
Linek, the extension’s unit leader, noted that for the lecture series to succeed, a person has to come with an open mind for the possibility that luv could happen.
“They will know what they should be looking for,” she said, “and how to step back and evaluate more objectively the relationship before it goes south.”
“How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk or Jerkette” takes place from 7 to 9 p.m. on five consecutive Wednesdays beginning Jan. 11 at St. Thomas the Apostle Church, 1500 Brookdale Rd., Naperville. To register, call DuPage County Extension at 630-653-4114 before Dec. 15. Registration is $30.
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