Hurled hairbrushes, slung insults and door slamming. Sounds like a confrontation between enemies, but these admissions of aggression were from women interviewed about their domestic life by Loreen Olson, a communication professor at the University of Missouri at Columbia.
Olson’s research finds that women were just as likely as men to initiate “minor aggression” with partners. That includes calling names, slamming doors, throwing objects and slapping the upper arms and torso.
“The majority of the aggression used was verbal, meaning insults, put-downs, name calling, swear words–real ugly talk,” Olson said. Ugly talk such as “you don’t know anything” or “you stupid jerk” is a form of psychological abuse that can damage a person’s psyche, according to Olson. Verbal abuse affects a victim’s concept of self-worth.
The study was published this fall in the journal Sex Roles, with interviews of 25 women, some who reported physically fighting with their partners.
“There were very few instances of severe aggression where [the woman] would slap on the face. One woman grabbed her partner by the collar of the shirt and slammed him against the wall. Another woman got in a wrestling match, rolling on the floor with her partner,” Olson said.
Men, however, are much less likely to suffer domestic violence, with the Bureau of Justice Statistics reporting that 15 percent of victims are men. The women in the study occasionally felt justified for their aggression, but many “recognized it wasn’t the right way to act,” Olson said.
“Any act of physical violence is not acceptable,” said Esta Soler, president of the Family Violence Prevention Fund, which combats domestic violence through education.
The avenues available to protect female victims also are available to men. “Both the health-care system and the judicial system are prepared to deal with any victim of violence,” Soler said. “If you feel your life is in danger and you are the victim of serious trauma, the hospitals and police stand ready to help.”