With so many stars flocking to Chicago this summer, it’s now a veritable celebrity jungle here. To help you navigate the field, At Play offers a celeb safari, complete with a handy field guide to the famous wildlife–whom to look for and where and when you might spot them. Remember: Don’t approachor try to feed the celebs. Good luck!
The Big 5
Like African safaris, we have identified the most elusive, biggest, most famous game of them all. And no, we don’t mean leopard, elephant, buffalo, lion and rhino. We’re talking the Oprah, the Chris, the Jen, the Vince and the John.
The Oprah Winfrey
SPECIES: Billionaire media mogul
CHARACTERISTICS: Known by its shrinking silhouette, curly black mane and couture duds, the Oprah Winfrey is often seen accompanied by cocker spaniels, friend Gayle King and its longtime mate, Stedman Graham. Until recently, the Oprah Winfrey might have been spotted in the Hermes habitat but now shuns this purveyor of luxury goods. Extremely elusive even in Chicago, the Oprah Winfrey has been spotted in recent years at East Bank Club taking yoga with Per and at Rosebud with Bono. Although monogamous, the Oprah Winfrey is not the marrying kind and has not produced any offspring. The Oprah Winfrey migrates between a $50 million nest in Montecito, Calif., and its spacious den attached to Water Tower Place.
The Chris Martin
SPECIES: Megastar songbird
CHARACTERISTICS: Known for its warbling in the band Coldplay and cross-species mating with A-list actor the Gwyneth Paltrow, the Chris Martin is migrating to the Chicago area for a short time for an Aug. 13 show at Wisconsin’s Alpine Valley Music Center. Easily recognized by its British-tinged chirp, slightly receding hair-line and handsome, but not preening, appearance, the Chris Martin can often be seen accompanied by the Paltrow and their offspring, the Apple. The last time the Chris Martin and family nested in Chicago, they stayed at The Peninsula Chicago and were spotted at Tavern on Rush and Green Zebra.
The Jennifer Aniston
SPECIES: A-list actor
CHARACTERISTICS: A carnivore of the Zone diet variety, the Jennifer Aniston has been spotted at Pane Caldo and Coco Pazzo Caferestaurants. With its small, lithe body, the Jennifer Aniston can easily outrun chubbier stars despite its smoking habit. The Jennifer Aniston is usually found in Los Angeles, but migrated to Chicago for the summer to film a romantic comedy, “The Break Up,” with the Vince Vaughn. Stayed at The Peninsula Chicago, often visiting the luxe hotel’s gym. Often seen with long-time friend and hairstylist Chris McMillan, the Jennifer Aniston mated for five years with one of the species’ finest specimens, the Brad Pitt, who has been spotted recently with lynx-like Angelina Jolie.
The Vince Vaughn
SPECIES: A-list actor
CHARACTERISTICS: Notably tall for the species, the Vince Vaughn flew into Chicago recently to film the romantic comedy “The Break Up.” A nocturnal party animal, the Vince Vaughn has been spotted at restaurants and night-clubs such as Coco Pazzo Cafe, Japonais, Vision and Level. The Vince Vaughn can also be seen atop a red double-decker tour bus filming near Chicago tourist spots such as Wrigley Field and Michigan Avenue through the summer. Raised in Lake Forest, the Vaughn recently migrated from Los Angeles to the River North neighborhood and can be spied there.
The John Malkovich
SPECIES: Actor/professional eccentric
CHARACTERISTICS: With its devilish appearance, balding pate and colorful clothing, the John Malkovich is hard to miss as it flits about Chicago during the summer filming of “Drunkboat” with fellow actor John Goodman. A native of Christopher, Ill., the John Malkovich recently launched a line of clothing called Uncle Kimono. The John Malkovich is occasionally spotted onstage at Steppenwolf Theatre, which it helped found, at restaurants like Bijan’s Bistro and near its roost in River North.
R. Kelly, and Jen, and Common, oh my!
Tote this field guide on your celebrity safari and check off the famous wildlife as you spy them this summer. And, as any good safari-goer knows, do not approach the wildlife!
Native songbirds
R. Kelly
SPECIES: Millionaire R&B songbird/defendant
CHARACTERISTICS: Famous as much for its legal troubles as its smooth R&B call, the R. Kelly, which evolved from Robert S. Kelly, can be spied at the top of the Billboard charts and occasionally in the Cook County Criminal Courts Building at 26th and California.
PRIME VIEWING TIME: Entering the courthouse before 10 a.m. on court dates.
OTHER NATIVE SONGBIRDS
Common (prime viewing time: Aug. 1 at House of Blues)
Billy Corgan
Migratory songbirds
Kenny Chesney
SPECIES: Country music songbird/mate of the Renee Zellweger
CHARACTERISTICS: Tiny but buff, the Kenny Chesney is easily distinguished by its balding pate, puka shell necklace and omnipresent cowboy hat. The Kenny Chesney normally lives in a posh suburb of Nashville and roosts with friends Tim McGraw and Faith Hill.
PRIME VIEWING TIME: Flying to Chicago to play Allstate Arena Aug. 23. Look for the Kenny around town then, possibly with equally-tiny mate, the Renee Zellweger.
OTHER MIGRATORY SONGBIRDS
Kelly Clarkson (prime viewing time: Aug. 31 at Northerly Island)
Neil Diamond (prime viewing time: Aug. 1-2 at United Center)
Billy Idol (prime viewing time: July 23 at Lollapalooza)
Alan Jackson (prime viewing time: Aug. 6 at Tweeter Center)
Jimmy Buffett (prime viewing time: Sept. 4-5 at Wrigley Field)
Trey Anastasio (prime viewing time: Aug. 10 at Northerly Island)
Marc Anthony (prime viewing time: Sept. 1 at Allstate Arena), perhaps with mate the J.Lo in tow
Queen Latifah (prime viewing time: July 29 at Northerly Island)
Jewel (prime viewing time: July 23 at the Genesee Theatre in Waukegan)
More Top Picks Best Blue Light Glasses Under 100
Indigenous species
Bill Rancic
SPECIES: “The Apprentice” reality TV winner/Trump promoter
CHARACTERISTICS: Do not expect to spot a Bill Rancic at the Trump International Hotel and Tower construction site on the Chicago River, where this reality TV personality “works.”
PRIME VIEWING TIME: The Bill Rancic is more often spotted at parties around town, charity events and hotspots like Rockit Bar & Grill.
Jeremy Piven
SPECIES: Showbird/friend of the John Cusack
CHARACTERISTICS: A chameleon that plays sleazy agent on HBO’s “Entourage” so well fellow members of species chirp emmynod, emmynod in its presence. The Jeremy Piven youthful habitat was Evanston but it is now often spotted with other Chicago-area species at charity events. The Jeremy Piven occasionally grazes with the John Cusack.
PRIME VIEWING TIME: At Cubs games, the Piven Workshop Theatre in Evanston and watering holes like Narcisse.
John Cusack
SPECIES: Native showbird
CHARACTERISTICS: Often found in romantic comedies on the big screen, the Evanston-born John Cusack is easily distinguishable by its height and resemblance to fellow showbird and sibling, the Joan Cusack.
PRIME VIEWING TIME: The John Cusack has been spotted in its habitat at Starbucks on Chestnut Street, Green Dolphin Street and other watering holes.
OTHER INDIGENOUS SPECIES
Joan Cusack
Bonnie Hunt
David Schwimmer
Bill Murray
James Denton
William Petersen
Sporting game
Nomar Garciaparra
SPECIES: Injured Cubs shortstop
CHARACTERISTICS: Athletic, handsome and easily injured, the Nomar Garciaparra is often spied with its equally-athletic mate, the Mia Hamm.
PRIME VIEWING TIME: Look for the Nomar Garciaparra limping its way to watering holes like Nine, grazing grounds like Carmine’s, fast-food joints like Chipotle and to Cubs games. Just don’t expect to see the Nomar Garciaparra running wild on the field anytime soon.
Frank Thomas
SPECIES: Powerhouse White Sox hitter
CHARACTERISTICS: Massive and brutal with a bat.
PRIME VIEWING TIME: The Frank Thomas can be seen at U.S. Cellular Field and occasionally at Rockit Bar & Grill, a watering hole so heavily trafficked it is in danger of drying up. Listen for the Frank’s distinctive, plaintive warble.
OTHER SPORTING GAME
Michael Jordan
Alex Rodriguez (prime viewing time: Yankees/White Sox, Aug. 19-21)
Johnny Damon (prime viewing time: Red Sox/White Sox, July 21-24)
Mark Prior (prime viewing time: on the mound at Wrigley Field)
Jennie Finch (prime viewing time: The Chicago Bandits games in Lisle)
Jen Schefft
SPECIES: Professional dater (“Bachelor” and “Bachelorette” reality TV veteran)
CHARACTERISTICS: This Ohio native sports lithe body, blond plumage and reality TV smile. Famous for its prolific and very public mating habits, the Jen Schefft could be spotted until recently with the Billy Dec, owner of Rockit Bar & Grill.
PRIME VIEWING: At Cubs games and Rockit Bar & Grill.
Invasive species
John Goodman
Ana Gasteyer (prime viewing time: during performances of “Wicked” at the Ford Center for the Performing Arts Oriental Theatre)
You have to have the right gear
So you want to take celebrity tracking to a whole new level? At Play asked experts, including a member of the paparazzi, to recommend the best gear for professional celeb spotting.
CAMERA: Canon EOS 1DS Mark II: $7,879.95
TELEPHOTO LENS: Canon EF 300mm f/2.8L IS USM Lens, a favorite of paparazzi: $4,375.95
FOR SPYING THE FAMOUS FROM AFAR: Swarovski STS80 Straight Spotting Scope Body ($1,309) with a Swarovski 20-60XS Eyepiece ($420)
More Top Picks Best King Size Weighted Blankets For Couples
FOR GRABBING A QUICK SIGNATURE: Sharpie: about $1.65.
FOR STANDING AROUND SETS AND THE OCCASIONAL SPRINT AFTER AN SUV WITH TINTED WINDOWS: For men, Mephisto Match ($325); for women, Mephisto Rush ($310)
Prices based on merchandise for sale at Central Camera, Walgreens, Hanig’s Footwear and Binoculars.com
Where the celebs roam
Most celebrity animals stay at one of three palaces of posh–The Peninsula Chicago, The Ritz-Carlton and Four Seasons–and don’t stray far from that Golden Triangle. But our safari guides say the celeb beasts occasionally leave their temporary habitats for these spots:
NORTH OF CEDAR
Bella Lounge: 1212 N. State Pkwy.
SOUTH OF ONTARIO
Blue Water Grill: 520 N. Dearborn St.
Rockit Bar & Grill: 22 W. Hubbard St.
Shaw’s Crab House: 21 E. Hubbard St.
Sugar: 108 W. Kinzie St.
Topolobampo: 445 N. Clark St.