Love–if not lust–is on the mind of Lorilee Craker, author of “We Should Do This More Often: A Parents’ Guide to Romance, Passion, and Other Prechild Activities You Vaguely Recall” (Water Brook, $12.99).
Love, because the mother of two writes from experience on what can happen to a couple after a child joins them, including how, for the woman, “the former love of [her] life becomes chief bottle washer, diaper fetcher, bill payer, and–let’s face it–roommate.”
Lust, because Craker isn’t shy about suggestions on keeping the fires stoked, like “[hopping] in the shower in your birthday suits as often as possible.”
Other tips run from fighting anxieties over leaving the kids to spend time alone, to the types of music and food to get you in the mood. Craker doesn’t put blame on either parent, but notes that both must do the work to re-form those bonds.
Ignore the occasional too-cute phrases and focus on the meaning behind her words. Your marriage could depend on it.
The Nasty as savior: “As long as your kids’ basic needs are being met, the children will actually feel happy and secure knowing that their parents have a loving, connected relationship.”