Some men think they stand a chance against women. They really should know better.
They may stroll into a relationship, or marriage, with the idea that everything is equal. They think they’re king of the castle, keeper of their domain, master of their house. But before they know what hits, they’re forced to pile their furniture and big boy toys into a back bedroom, garage or an outside storage building.
Guys (and their wives) say they need a space to call their own. Some place that’s familiar, with all the stuff not allowed in the house. An area that’s got their touch, if not for sanity’s sake, then for their suffering egos. Take Curry Wilson. He gave up control of his newly built house long before the construction started.
He reached an agreement with his wife, Jennifer, who owns Spice Furniture and Design in Waco, Texas. She got to decorate the entire house as she saw fit. But he got one room for himself with no design help from her.
So far, they’ve both held up their ends of the bargain, they said.
Curry’s space above the garage is pumped up with testosterone. It’s a beer-drinking, sports-watching zone that pays homage to all things masculine. He’s got sports posters pinned to the walls and ceiling. He’s got a 4-foot-tall armadillo wearing a hat standing at the door. He’s got a train running on tracks around the room. He’s got a Dallas Cowboys flag hanging in the window. He’s got neon beer signs lighting up walls.
More Top Picks Best Tvs
“It’s a nice little getaway,” he said. “I go up there on Sundays to watch football games and sometimes I have friends come over. I don’t have to worry about watching the Lifetime Channel up there. It’s totally mine.”
He didn’t have a design strategy for the room. He said he started hanging things until he ran out of space.
“I used every little space I could find,” he said. “It was kind of like putting a puzzle together. It’s really hard to describe to people. You have to see it to believe it.”
His wife occasionally stops in to watch television, but mostly she doesn’t think about the room. For her, bliss is knowing house guests don’t know the room exists, unless it’s mentioned. A small door in the garage leads to the upstairs space that’s completely separate from the main house.
Wilson is not the only male in the species who’s marked his turf.
Jim Hail, a psychology instructor, said men sometimes use room decor as a way to separate their identity from the females in their lives.
“It may be a show that their personality is not reflected in how their wives or girlfriends have chosen to decorate the rest of the house or apartment,” he said. “…To decorate a space with your favorite items is to say, `Look, this is me, this is who I am.”‘
Hail knows this philosophy first-hand. He doesn’t have much of a say in his house’s interior decor, which includes antique brass furniture and purple walls. But the adjacent workshop is dedicated to his interests. He calls it his Tim “The Toolman” Taylor getaway, after the popular sitcom “Home Improvement.”
Hail decorated his space with airplane photos and memorabilia. He’s a pilot and used his shop to build the plane he flies today.
His decor includes signs given to him by different friends and acquaintances, a shelf built to look like an old bi-plane and a framed newspaper documenting Charles Lindbergh’s flight to Paris, found at a garage sale by his son and daughter-in-law.
“I have loved airplanes since childhood and have had a pilot’s license for many years, so aviation is a big pleasure for me,” Hail said. “I enjoy looking at pictures of airplanes. My wife says, `If you’ve seen one airplane, you’ve seen them all.”‘
Most men say they don’t really care about the decor of the house, although they do become interested if they’re sleeping in a bed with a frilly canopy and pink, frilly blankets, Hail said.
For men, the issue lies with the invasion of their space. When they move in with a woman, they’ve gone from making decisions about furniture and accessories to being limited to one or two pieces, psychologists and designers said. The solution is compromise.
“For young married couples, decor can become an issue for them,” said head of Spice’s design department Jessica McCormick. “They’re coming into a marriage with their stuff, and they have to learn to take what they have and mix it together. You really don’t want it to come down to a battle of wills between the man and woman.”
McCormick said her husband has a sports fantasy room, complete with a foosball table and dart board. His only complaint about the room is the purple sofa she placed in there.
“Guys don’t need or want a lot of fuss to a room,” McCormick said. “If they had their way, guys would have a sectional and a cooler. And don’t forget the leather or upholstered recliner with a cup holder.”
As for Wilson, his room is just the way he likes it, he said, except maybe it could use another beer sign.