Dear Ann Landers: In the last several years, you have asked your readers to make April 2 a day for reconciliation, to mend fences and reach out to family members and friends who have become estranged.
My ex-husband left me when my daughter was 5 months old. We lost touch with him when she was 9. She is now 16 years old. Eighteen months ago, we got a computer and searched for her father’s address. We sent him an e-mail and a letter, and he responded. After all these years, he is back in my daughter’s life, which makes her incredibly happy. Thank you, Ann, for telling people to attempt a reconciliation. Sometimes, it is actually worth it. — Mom in Ponca City, Okla.
Dear Mom: Since 1989, I have suggested that April 2 be set aside as Reconciliation Day. The idea was inspired by a letter from a reader who said her mother and aunt hadn’t spoken in years and she missed her cousins. She also had friends who had been close at one time, but were now estranged. She was getting older and more aware of how quickly time was passing, and she realized these friends and relatives could be lost for all time.
I agreed that a day should be designated where everyone would vow to write a letter or make a phone call to mend a strained or broken relationship. It could also be the day on which we would all agree to accept the olive branch extended by a former friend.
Life is too short to hold grudges. To be able to forgive can be enormously healing and life-enhancing. It’s the best example of casting your bread upon the waters and getting back caviar sandwiches. While not all relationships can be mended, it is always worth a try. Here’s more on the subject:
Dear Ann Landers: Thank you for reminding people of the importance of Reconciliation Day. Last year, when I read that column, I had been estranged from a dear friend who helped me become the person I am today.
He introduced me to music, art and culture. I stupidly lent money to his sister, and things got ugly. We lost touch five years ago. I wrote to him in care of his parents several times, asking for forgiveness, but my letters were returned, unopened. I stopped trying.
Your column woke me up, and I decided to call him. We cleared up all the misunderstandings resulting from the loan, and I am happy to say we are now friends once more. Your readers should be aware that friendship is more important than pride.
Please keep telling them about Reconciliation Day. It could result in a great deal of happiness for all concerned. — Relieved in Connecticut
Dear Relieved: Your story is proof that it is never too late to mend those broken fences. Here’s a letter from a reader with a new twist on the subject:
Dear Ann Landers: I would like to add something to your annual column on Reconciliation Day.
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Please consider expanding the day to include reconciliation between countries. On April 2, leaders of every faction at war would call for a 24-hour cease-fire. Maybe, in time, it could extend to two days, or even a week. Think about the lives that could be saved. It could become a day of peace, a time for those at war to work on their differences. Please pass it along, Ann. — Jeff in Los Angeles
Dear Jeff: What a lovely idea — although it is unlikely to take hold. When I think about the wars going on in the world today, some of the conflicts seem unsolvable. Nonetheless, a 24-hour period of peace would be a blessing.
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To find out more about Ann Landers and read her past columns, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.