Uh-oh. This is too good to be true. You say, “Congrats, Illinois.” I say condolences, Bill Self.
You Illini fans say, “What a relief.” I say it’s only a reprieve. You say, “A No. 1 seed!” I say demon seed.
You say: “Justice prevails. The selection committee overlooked our little two-point slipup in the semis of a meaningless conference tournament and rewarded us for a great season against one of the nation’s toughest schedules.”
I say Illinois backed into an easy-street seed that coach Self didn’t particularly want. Self went from doubting his team would get a No. 1 seed to–huh?–being handed the most advantageous rung in the entire bracket. Not only does Illinois get to stay “home” in the Midwest Regional, but it opens against the winner of the “play-in” game between Winthrop and Northwestern State.
As of press time it was unclear whether Winthrop is actually a school or Dick Vitale’s butler.
Arguably Illinois versus Play-In in Dayton is an even easier jump-start than the committee rewarded Duke–Monmouth in Greensboro, a day at the racetrack. This seed might have been what you wanted but not what Self needed. He’d have had an easier time relieving tension and restoring unity after his team’s collapse against Indiana if his Illini had been penalized with a No. 2 seed in the East or West.
Then it could have been angry vows of, “We’ll show ’em.” Now it’s “We blew our opening to cinch a No. 1 and build momentum in the conference tournament. Now we’ve been given a second chance in what might be the easiest overall regional. We’d better not blow it.”
Uh-oh. Throats tighten. Rims shrink. Expectations grow even heavier than they’ve been since December. Against Indiana, Illinois suffered its first identity crisis. Is it a one-man team or a 10-deep juggernaut? Can the Illini survive for long against defenses that take away Frank Williams in the last five minutes?
You see open road to the Final Four. I see Charlotte’s web.
Call this prediction a little Self-help. If nothing else he can draw devil’s horns on my picture and post this column on his bulletin board, just to infuriate his undeserving top seeds. I say the committee quite fiendishly built a little early trap door into Illinois’ cakewalk.
I can give you about 49 reasons why Sunday will be a bloody Sunday for your Illini. In one of the juicier first-round matchups, the ninth-seeded 49ers of Charlotte will outgun terribly talented Tennessee. The Vols are like a bad NBA team–lots of high picks, no heart or chemistry. Charlotte is another story.
As Marquette coach Tom Crean said at the Conference USA tournament, “If you’re one of the elite teams, you don’t want to face Charlotte the first or second weekend.”
Certainly not after you’ve lost your edge against Indiana and your tough-game rhythm against Play-In. Sunday the Illini will face sudden death against a team that has won 12 of its last 14, including its conference tourney and a stunningly easy 80-72 win over one of the country’s scariest teams, Cincinnati. Here is Charlotte’s best bet to become a Final Four Cinderella since Cornbread Maxwell introduced the school to America in 1977.
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I smell some more Cornbread. These Niners faltered early only because one of the country’s best freshmen, 6-foot-9-inch Rodney White, hurt a knee. He’s back and averaging about 20 points and eight rebounds.
Here’s why White is the best player you’ve never heard of. After losing to Charlotte, Miami coach Perry Clark pulled White aside and said, “You keep your head on straight and you could be one of the best ever.”
Unlike Frankie Williams, White has plenty of dependable help. Diego Guevara and Jobey Thomas have been mad-bombing threes for the last month the way Self prays Cory Bradford could make them for a half. Purdue transfer Cam Stephens provides more Illini-style muscle that helped Charlotte crush Cincinnati on the boards 42-27. Coach Bobby Lutz is regarded as one of the better strategists.
Look out below: Charlotte 84, Illinois 82.
Charlotte narrowly misses the Final Four, losing to Arizona in the regional final. Oklahoma proves Michigan State’s Jason Richardson isn’t quite ready for March or the NBA. But Florida wins the South, Stanford the West and Duke the East. Duke edges Stanford and levels Arizona.
You say I’ve been planting too many hemp seeds. I say Self needs me.