Welcome, Toni Kukoc, to the playoffs. Nice of you to climb out from under the coats in the guest bedroom, or wherever you’ve been, and join the party along with, to quote Charlotte coach Dave Cowens, “Michael, Scottie, Dennis and them other guys.”
It is unusual for an opposing coach to call opposing players by their given names, especially Rodman, who will answer to almost anything and has been called all of that.
It is a wonder Cowens didn’t ask the Bulls to sign his game program. It would be for his nephew, of course. Whose name would also be Dave.
Cowens seems so awed by an actual team with actual competence that even his admiration can’t be hidden behind token irritation.
“Of course I’m disappointed,” Cowens said. “I’m disappointed.”
What Cowens is disappointed about is that he finds he has a team full of tongue-standers, to put it nicely, quitters, to put it truthfully.
“We looked like the aging team out there,” Cowens said.
Charlotte defended its home turf as if it applied for annexation to Chicagoland. And it probably would fit. There are a couple vacant lots in Berwyn that could handle anything worth having.
“I guess we’ll just have to see how we respond as men,” Cowens said.
Ah, yes. As men. This brings me back to Kukoc.
On the last play of the game, Kukoc strained his back, not considered serious, not now that Kukoc has become significant again, not when his more significant teammates are taking significant blows as well.
“A twinge,” said coach Phil Jackson, who doesn’t have to feel the pain.
Scottie Pippen hurt his back also, recovered, excelled, turning Glen into Puffed Rice. Rodman was choked by Anthony Mason’s strong hand, his left, and not only laughed it off, he sneered it off.
“He wanted to tango,” Rodman said. “But he didn’t know the steps.”
Where was I? Oh, yes. Kukoc.
It is not insignificant that Kukoc was in at the end of a rout, getting his psyche shined, for he needs success wherever he can find it.
It is not the fact that most of Kukoc’s points came in garbage time, because anytime against the Charlotte Hornets can be classified as garbage time.
It is not just Kukoc’s double-digit scoring that meant the most in a game where it was not needed, although mathematically the Bulls would have lost by one without all 15 of Kukoc’s points.
What happened this day, what is worth registering, is a single offensive putback from Kukoc. That is what promises more, what suggests that Kukoc can be of future use when the stakes are larger and the defenders more resolute.
Playing “Where’s Toni?” is an annual playoff diversion, like ignoring Michael Buffer and his one-trick gadget, that “Let’s Get Ready to Rumble” gimmick.
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As far as I can tell, every time Buffer has opened a Bulls game with it, the team paying him has lost to the Bulls. He should shout, “Let’s get ready to tuuuuummmmble.” Or give back the check.
No matter. Where did we leave Kukoc? Oh, yes, in the midst of substantial peril from large and angry men, under his own basket, not where he is usually found, not where he usually wants to be.
Here’s the shot from Luc Longley. Off the rim. Kukoc grabs the rebound, takes a blow from lug-of-the-moment Matt Geiger, muscles back up, sending Geiger off him, and drops the ball in the basket.
A routine play for most power players, an exception for Kukoc, as startling a statement as if he had just confessed to ironing his raisins.
Kukoc will not be pushed around.
From here on? That remains to be seen, but there is evidence for the archives of it not happening at least once, in a game that included Anthony Mason.
Kukoc banged. Kukoc won. The bar is raised.
More amazingly, Kukoc is lifting it. My, oh, my.