We can see the commercials now: “Wrestlemania XIV: The Mouth that Gored.”
SOMETHING TO CHEW ON
Even though he has been banned from boxing, the World Wrestling Federation wants to make Tyson part of the Wrestlemania XIV pay-per-view extravaganza March 29 in Boston.
The WWF is attempting to cut a deal through promoter Don King, but they’re not sure if Tyson will bite.
GOLDEN NEST EGGS
One out of three major league baseball players were paid salaries of $1 million or more in 1996. Forty-nine players–about 7 percent–made $5 million or more.
Evidently baseball doesn’t need a commissioner as much as it needs a Swiss banker.
GREAT GATE IN ’98
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The Cubs have made an earnest effort to upgrade their on-field product, but they aren’t taking any chances at the gate. They’ll continue to be on the cutting edge of promotional giveaway days next season, holding two more Beanie Baby days and even a Barbie day when young fans can get a Cubs cap and jacket for their favorite fashion doll. There will also be a Hot Wheels day when youngsters get a toy vehicle trimmed in Cubs colors.
It’s not too late for the White Sox marketing department–assuming, of course, that they have one–to counterattack, and naturally we have some suggestions:
– Barbie the Sox Fan day. Fans get doll-sized white surrender flag and miniature season tickets for San Francisco Giants.
– Albert Belle Toy Sport Utility Vehicle day. Wind it up and it chases away pesky trick-or-treaters.
– Sox 1997 Highlight Video day. Plenty of action-packed footage, but tape ends abruptly in middle with team only three games out of first place.
JUST BUY IT
Nike announced that it is changing its primary ad slogan from “Just Do It” to “I Can.”
Once again, the last two words of the slogan–“For Money”–were implied but omitted.