However tempting the prospect, no mail carriers were harmed in the production of this column.
Dear Mr. Lincicome:
I am not sure if you are a sportswriter or a commentator on the sports scene. If you are a sportswriter, then you should be knowledgeable about the subject and report facts and not your opinions about sports figures. If you are a commentator on the sports world, then I forgive you for your lack of knowledge and your inability to recognize Dennis Rodman for the great, if not the greatest, rebounder in the history of basketball.–Joseph A. Kitzes, Northbrook.
Dear Mr. Kitzes:
Apology accepted.
Mr. Lincicome:
It did not take you very long to jump off the Cubs’ bandwagon. I hope you did not hurt yourself (ha!). When the Cubs are winning, are Cub fans “fools, masochists and repeat offenders?”–Frank Gordon, Buffalo Grove.
Mr. Gordon:
No, they are great-grandparents.
Dear Bernie:
Your cynical, sarcastic demeanor has enriched our lives for years now, further removing the luster that both professional and college sports have managed to be dissolved with greed and corruption. But I have a question. If your spirited pursuit to devalue all sports, institutions, teams and players comes to fruition, then who do you suppose will you write about?–Scott Levin, Chicago.
Dear Scott:
There’s always animal testing.
Bernie:
I have nothing but the utmost respect for the Tribune, but I think it is time they see the error of their ways and get rid of any columnist who would let a personal vendetta and anger over losing an office pool affect his or her writing. Arizona took your money and made you look stupid to your peers, didn’t they? Every time I look at your picture in the Tribune, I will see a tired, worn out old curmudgeon with egg on his face.–Jeff A. Johnston, Des Plaines.
Jeff:
That’s eggs Benedict, actually.
Mr. Lincicome:
Albert Belle will never be an angel. He’s a baseball player and only because he’s getting paid $55 million and black, you choose to whitewash him in the press. If he has a decent career and puts up Hall of Fame numbers, it will be people like you who will put up obstructions to that path. You may benefit from a trial of Prozac, buddy.–Alfred Hardaway, M.D.
Mr. Hardaway, M.D.:
More Top Picks Steam Shower
And I still can’t see Hale-Bopp.
Bernie Lincicome:
It seems that every time I visit Chicago you have some kind of dig about Nebraska football. What an easy job you have. Anyone can dig up dirt.–Raymond Lonowski, Omaha, Neb.
Raymond Lonowski:
But only a few of us can lift it.
Dear Bernie:
Shane Matthews never got a chance with the Bears but this crybaby brat (Rick Mirer) comes walking into town and gets the job ahead of everyone. I don’t understand why everyone else’s quarterback always looks better than our own.–Ron Birnbaum, Ft. Myers, Fla.
Dear Ron:
Because everyone else’s quarterback . . .
Bernie:
It is disgusting that your cynical, anti-Illini views are splashed on the front page of the sports section. Is every team that loses a close, hard-fought game going to be labeled a “choke” by you?–Jim Faro,
Jim:
The name “Bears” is already taken.
Bernie Lincicome:
(You) insisted that figure skating is an exhibition, not a competition, that it is “repetition” and that repetition is not a sport. From what we see, practice and repetition are important training factors of every athletic endeavor.–Lou Sherman, Skokie Valley Skating Club.
Lou Sherman:
Then you have never seen Shaquille O’Neal at the free-throw line.