Some things you suspect, some things you guess at and some things you just know.
Dennis Rodman’s mural does come in wallet-size, provided you use Michael Jordan’s wallet.
When the Bears start studying the draft, even my head hurts.
If Darnell Autry were, as is usually the case at Northwestern, an acting football player and not a football player acting, the NCAA would have no interest.
It is not likely Ryne Sandberg will again go two years between base hits unless he becomes a pitcher or Minnie Minoso.
My Kentucky Derby $2 is on Unbridled’s Song; I can always use an extra 20 cents.
There would be fewer overweight umpires if they had to run with the players as officials in other sports have to; come to think of it, there would be fewer overweight first basemen too.
Say she’s insensitive, but if she had considered it a real tragedy, Marge Schott would have buried John McSherry in the outfield alongside her dog.
If Dennis Rodman wants to head-butt someone, be my guest with Lil’ Penny, that flipping little Anfernee Hardaway puppet.
We pause for this commercial message: Your user-friendly Colombia cartel presents America’s Team, the Dallas Cowboys.
Mike Tyson is entitled to whine about being underpaid and Elle Macpherson is allowed to cry over a chipped nail.
The Lakers now know Cedric Ceballos is the guy to go to when they need water skis.
A two-fer is a lawyer discount to athletes for handling contract disputes and handgun possession charges in the same trip to the courthouse.
The NCAA is considering moving from suburban Kansas City, possibly to Florida, no doubt to be closer to its convictions.
The NBA will use teenage guard Stephon Marbury for dental floss.
The Final Four has come to mean the number of good college basketball players who didn’t turn pro before their senior years.
If Orlando’s Anthony Bowie calls time out in order to get a triple double against the Pistons, I’m guessing he still has his 1st-grade report card framed and his baby teeth in a jar.
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Curious how Georgetown’s John Thompson was not allowed to invest in a can’t-lose gambling proposition when recruiting is the biggest game of chance there is.
Obviously, the Detroit Red Wings don’t brake for Canadiens.
The two biggest stories of the baseball season will be Don Mattingly’s return to the Yankees and Cal Ripken Jr. taking a day off; Mattingly first.
Chances are the return of Buster Douglas to the boxing ring will not go past the salad bar.
Jerry Reinsdorf needs Phil Jackson more than the other way around.
Really, it is possible to applaud Michelle Kwan for being a fine young figure skater without hyperventilating.
The bad news is the Bears may open the season at home on Monday night against the Cowboys; the good news is, the Cowboys may not be allowed to leave their jurisdiction.
The Bears will miss Jeff Graham more than they will benefit from Alonzo Spellman.
Just to keep the middle relief pitching straight, the Sox ought to sew their real names on the backs of their shirts–Intern, Novice and Apprentice.
According to my stopwatch, Dennis Rodman’s apology came faster than Mahmoud Abdul-Rauf’s compromise on the national anthem.
No, Michael Irvin did not use the same motel room as Jennifer Capriati. How do these rumors get started?
It is not too soon to ask what Lon Kruger has done for Illinois lately.