Q-I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a little more than a year and we’ve had intercourse a total of maybe 10 times. In the beginning he couldn’t achieve a full erection and I thought it was impotency. When I got the nerve to confront him, he had excuses: “I’ve fantasized about you so long that now I don’t know how to handle it,” or “I’m so tired.” Believe me, I’ve heard them all.
Finally, I suggested he see a doctor. He said he called some and they gave him advice over the phone. (Hard to believe.) He claimed that he’d hurt his back in a car accident and that had damaged nerves and he did go to a chiropractor. Do you have any suggestions?
A-The first suggestion that I have for you is that he go to see a urologist. If there is something wrong with him physically, certainly there is no way of finding that out over the phone. If the urologist says everything is OK, then the two of you might have to go and see a sex therapist. You could try reading a book, such as Dr. Bernie Zilbergeld’s “Male Sexuality,” but I really believe that he should be checked out by a urologist first.
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