For Susan Veschack, as for millions of other Americans, it was not supposed to go this far.
”I can`t believe (Saddam) Hussein hasn`t backed down,” the 33-year-old homemaker from Sauk Village said Monday. ”I know most people feel this is something we have to do, and I guess I do too. But I`m not happy about it.”
As the hours ticked down toward the United Nations` deadline for Iraqi troops to withdraw from Kuwait, Chicago-area residents shared a common bond of anguish over the potential loss of American lives.
The feeling that war might now be unavoidable seemed to overcome many long-held hopes that sons, daughters, spouses and friends would somehow be spared the killing and the dying.
”It just seemed so remote before,” said Sherry Mech of Lockport, who has two sons stationed in Saudi Arabia-one with the Army, the other with the Marines-as part of Operation Desert Shield.
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”I`m still hoping that we`ll come out of this peacefully, because we`ll lose too many lives. I`d rather pay more for oil than lose our kids over this,” Mech said.
Amid the deep divisions over the merits of sending U.S. troops to the Persian Gulf area and trying to force Iraqi President Saddam Hussein`s hand, there was a broad, numbing sense of dread on Monday as the possible consequences sank in.
”I just broke down into tears and cried because I may never see my son again,” said Annie Glen of Clarendon Hills, whose 20-year-old son, Tom, an infantryman, is among those who could soon be ordered into battle.
Concerns for loved ones, and for the hundreds of thousands of strangers poised at the edge of combat, were played out Monday in loud public demonstrations, quiet prayer vigils and in tearful, private ways.
”How many times have you heard, `The war to end all wars?` ” asked Bishop Joseph Imesch of the Catholic Diocese of Joliet at a mass for peace Monday evening at St. Margaret Mary Catholic Church in Naperville. ”Yet we continue to stumble along confusedly, that war will bring peace. It never has.”
As in the tense days leading up to the Cuban missile crisis almost three decades ago, some clung to the hope that the standoff will ultimately go down in history as a tragedy skirted, albeit at the last, harrowing moment.
But others had already lost faith in a happy ending. And even for some who staunchly support President Bush and his Persian Gulf policy and who accept the need to go to war if Iraq holds firm, the likely human toll weighed heavy as the time for finding a peaceful solution slipped away.
”We`re taking the best of our youth and sending them into an unfair situation,` said Randy Parker, 36, of Elmhurst. ”It`s just craziness that we`re doing this.”
Also confusing was the rationale for fighting, whether the fighting would be to repel aggression or simply to preserve access to cheap oil.
”I don`t think we should be over there at all. We`re fighting for oil, and I think life is worth more than oil,” said Daniel Coleman, a 66-year-old retiree from Markham and a World War II veteran. ”Don`t you think life is worth more than a gallon of gas?”
Robert Hubbard, 28, of Crystal Lake took a different view. ”I`m very apprehensive, but the world is too small to let someone at a whim take over another country,” said Hubbard, an insurance salesman.
If the war dragged on, Hubbard said, he would be willing to join the military. ”I can`t say I`m totally for the draft, but I`d fight for the United Nations` right to do the right thing,” he explained.
Thomas Flynn, a regional sales manager in Downers Grove, said he gets angry when people suggest ”John Wayne solutions-just blast them out of the water.”
But he is glad he does not have to make the decision whether to fight or not in the days ahead.
”Do I want to go to war? No,” Flynn said. ”But then again, I don`t know what to do with Saddam Hussein.”
Edward Dolney, a mail carrier from Bartlett, is one of those who have resorted to prayer in the days leading up to the United Nations` deadline.
But by Monday, Dolney said, he had concluded that those prayers are not going to be answered. On the eve of what could be the outbreak of hostilities, Dolney said he started praying for the next best thing, a short conflict.
”I hope it`s only three to four weeks at the most,” said Dolney, who has two nephews in the Persian Gulf. ”If it drags on, there will be too many lives lost.”
There was no shortage of patriotism in the region Monday. Shoppers declared their support for Bush and the need to stop a despot.
”I was hoping the guy would pull out of Kuwait,” Robert Willis, 59, a longshoreman from Chicago Heights, said of Hussein. ”I don`t want to see a war. I still hope it`s not too late. But we have to meet the deadline.
But William Chalbers, a floor-covering salesman from Downers Grove, worries that his son, a Marine, could be risking his life solely for cheaper oil. He believes the U.S. should give negotiations more of a chance.
”I`m not totally against the the use of force, but I don`t think we`ve exhausted negotiation,” Chalbers said. ”To have one meeting and say it`s a failure, it`s typically American. We want to take one aspirin and have our headache go away. It takes a lot gutsier person to stick out negotiation.”
Many, including Nancy Hamouz, a church day-care provider in Clarendon Hills whose 20-year-old son, Michael, is staioned in Saudi Arabia, struggled with conflicting feelings-great impatience to get the crisis resolved, but an equally strong desire to do it prudently.
”A part of me feels I should trust the president and the Congress,”
Hamouz said. ”Another part of me feels they`re moving too fast.”
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Some of the estimated 100,000 Arab-Americans in the Chicago area said they fear one impact of a war will be additional discrimination against them. ”I don`t think people make the distinction between Saddam Hussein and Arabs. We`re all in the same class,” said Saleh Abu-Ali, an Arab-American who moved here from the West Bank in 1971 and now owns a convenience store on Chicago`s South Side.
Among older people, the prospect of another war dredges up memories of Vietnam and Korea. Many who support the use of force against Iraq want the U.S. to avoid the mistakes made in these earlier conflicts. They want the military to strike hard and fast, with the commitment to winning militarily, not just politically.
”We all tasted the bitterness of Vietnam. I don`t want to see that again,” said Kathy Burkholder of Chicago Heights, whose 23-year-old son, Thomas, is now an Air Force transportation specialist in the Gulf.
”I want it done correctly this time, and I`m anxious to see it over as soon as possible.”
For a generation of high school students, however, this is the first real experience of war jitters beyond the classroom.
”When you read in history books about war, and when you hear your grandparents say, `I was there,` you think you`re going to be able to say the same thing to your kids-if you live through it,” said Angela Camp, 17, of Mt. Prospect.
”When I heard Saddam Hussein say that Americans will swim in their own blood, it scared me a lot.”