A Beatles reunion? No way, says George Harrison. ”Let sleeping dogs lie,” replied Harrison after hearing of Paul McCartney`s proposed reprise-sans John Lennon, who was slain in 1980. ”What good are three Beatles without John?” asked Harrison, 46. ”It`s too far in the past.”
AAAARGH! IT`S DON JOHNSON By all accounts, that June wedding between Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith was a blast. But gate crashers got buckshot, cries the tabloid Star, which has sued the ”Miami Vice” star, claiming that shotgun blasts were fired at its helicopter circling overhead. The alleged co-culprit, bodyguard Greg Isaacs, says he was skeet shooting when the copter flew past his trigger finger. The Star insists he ”ambushed” its photographer and reporter. Considering the tabloid`s light-gauge reputation, one might say that Isaacs peppered a dodo, not a pigeon.
OMAHA IS A MADDHOUSE Sexism has reared its ugly head over which gender legally can get angriest about drunk driving. In a trademark infringement lawsuit filed in Omaha, Mothers Against Drunk Driving demand that a similarly-oriented cadre of fathers-called Mad Dads-choose some other name. MADD lawyers argue that angry fathers can be MADD Dads if they like, but not Mad Dads-even if they`re on the same side. The argument leaves Mad Dads Inc. nonplussed. Said spokesman John Foster: ”Mad Dads doesn`t have much money. All we have is firm commitment and determination.” But guys, are you mad enough to do something about it?
GOLDWATER, HE`S HIP Ever the quipster despite another round of surgery for degenerative arthritis, Barry Goldwater left St. Luke`s Medical Center in Phoenix still shooting from the hip-his sixth. ”If I don`t run out of parts, I`ll probably be here the rest of my life,” said the Arizona Republican, 80, who also has an artificial left knee. Doctors are optimistic that the former five-term senator can resume an active lifestyle.
IRS GETS THE LAST LAUGH Television comic Redd Foxx talks a good line, but apparently he doesn`t listen well. After ignoring four IRS warnings to pay $755,166 in federal taxes owed since 1983, the onetime star of ”Sanford and Son” stood mute as federal agents entered his Las Vegas mansion and departed with seven cars, the jewelry off his neck and . . . well, everything except his bed. ”It looked like a . . . raid,” said his agent, Prince Spencer. ”They really played it kind of rough.” Foxx, who also must vacate his home, complained of inadequate warning: ”I could have gotten in touch with Eddie Murphy or Richard Pryor or Frank Sinatra or somebody who knows that, you know, I have been helpful to a lot of people.” Name dropping aside, it was Foxx`s second strikeout for tax neglect. When he filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy in 1983, he acknowledged $1.6 million in unpaid taxes.
JESSICA HAHN IS A NO-SHOW The last laugh in Windsor, Ont., was on the audience. Some 75 patrons paid $10 apiece to see Jessica Hahn at a nude-dancing club. But they got only a peek at sellevangelism. ”It`s true that you`re seeing me, but I`m not taking my clothes off,” said Hahn, adding, ”The difference between what I`m doing and what Jim Bakker did is that he passes around a collection plate.”
Million Dollar Saloon manager John Trecapelli Jr. said he delivered exactly what his advertisements promised: that Hahn would appear in person. ”I can`t be responsible for what people think,” he added.
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