Mike Royko

Because of Ross Perot`s sudden popularity, the pollsters are frantically poking into the brains of every known voting bloc for clues to this political upheaval. And one of their recent...

It`s really none of my business, but that pretty Stephanie Grimaldi got knocked up by her boyfriend, Dan Ducruet, who runs a fish business and drives a motorcycle. And it`s...

Just by its name, you can tell that the golden-cheeked warbler is a really nice little bird. If it weren`t, they would have named it the soot-faced croaker or the...

Every baseball team has its own personality. And with this season about a third over, the personality of the current Cubs team has been established. It`s boring. It might be...

''This is something like watching a cowboy movie,'' Slats Grobnik said. What is? ''This Ross Perot guy. He`s like the stranger who rides in and all of a sudden there`s...

Being a busy and prominent dentist specializing in children`s trembling mouths, Marvin Berman needed an efficient office manager. He has seven chairs and nine employees. And for five years, he...

He was picked up and brought in for questioning after a pollster provided a tip to the Media Patrol. They shoved him into a chair in an unused studio, aimed...

It would take a state bureaucrat maybe 30 minutes to drag his butt from his downtown desk to Ronald Chattler`s company on Grand Avenue. If he used his eyes and...

An elderly man, he spoke firmly and precisely. ''I`m calling to give you a story about a very shocking and dangerous situation that is being covered up by school officials...

''I just had one of the shocks of my life,'' Slats Grobnik said, his hand shaking so badly that he sloshed his drink. ''Our nation is in peril.'' What is...