Mike Royko

He was very tall and lanky and spit tobacco juice. A real pro baseball player. And he could swing the bat. Every season, his average was up over .300. But...

There's this old joke. A guy is walking on a very dark street. As he nears the glow of a street light, he sees a drunken friend bent over and...

On a stupidity scale, a recent poll about doctors' earnings is right up there. It almost scored a perfect brain-dead 10. It was commissioned by some whiny consumers group called...

The first batch of Gripe Mail has arrived and it is a joy to read. Such enthusiastic grumbling, crabbing and maligning. It is moments like this that make me feel...

With the Senate holding hearings on accepting open homosexuals in the military, it might consider inviting a prominent leader of the Chicago gay community to testify. He is Jon-Henri Damski,...

Letters, calls, complaints and great thoughts from readers: Elizabeth Madeline, Chicago: I'm so traumatized, I'm ready to see a doctor. I can barely speak, I'm so upset. I just bought...

A colleague, Bob Greene, recently did an unusual and inspirational series of columns. He asked readers what they liked about this country, and thousands of them responded. Bob then printed...

A publicity firm that represents a corporation has sent me a large package of information about pizza. More specifically, what has become widely known as "Chicago pizza." It begins: "There...

If women are so dim-witted that they would move in with David Koresh, the wacky Waco cult leader, and become part of his harem, that is not my concern. Different...

It's spring. And with the new season comes the same dumb question, usually accompanied by a foolish giggle. This time it was from a young man working in the sports...